Two months, and yet it feels like
It happened only yesterday.
You probably won’t believe me when I say
I knew it was over even before I started saying those words.
I know you too much,
just like how you know me — all too well.

Remember when we used to say it feels as though
We have known each other maybe in our past life?
I have truly felt that. To me, you are more than a friend —
Someone I won’t have a chance to have twice in this lifetime,
The kind of bond you wouldn’t just find with anyone,
Like two souls knowing one another inside and out.

You may not believe that angels do exist,
But to me, you are an angel sent to me from above.
Even when I didn’t deserve it, you came into my life
At a time I had truly given up on myself.
Your words gave light to my dimming soul.
I don’t know if I have ever thanked you enough for that.

As my tears started to fall, it seemed like
I was preparing myself to bid farewell.
Goodbye to those seven years of memories we had.
It probably sounds selfish, but
For me, that wasn’t enough.
It will never be enough.

You’re moving on with your life,
and I, on the other hand,
I am still here, stuck
Right where you found me,
Only deeper and darker,
Just like before — still digging my own grave.

If only I had been honest to tell you all these things,
That I don’t want you to see me ruining myself,
That it’d be better if I cut ties so you wouldn’t have to worry about me,
So you wouldn’t hear my problems over and over again.
But how could I do that when I don’t want you to leave?
I couldn’t imagine life without you,
But maybe I guess I should start now.

I’ll miss staring at my phone with your name on it
And texting you when it stops ringing.
I regret not taking those calls.
I should have, even just for once.
I should have properly learned to play that game,
So I wouldn’t feel lost when I go there whenever I miss you.
But if there’s one thing I want you to know,
Even if we can no longer talk for hours,
Talk about life and things and even senseless things,
You’re someone I will never forget.
And if there’s really life after this one,
I hope I get to meet you again
And do all these things over again
With the same you and me, but I hope
It would be different this time.

#InvisibleThreads
© euphemia
@pixiedust