I can't tell whether I am sad anymore
Nor when I am happy for sure
All the pretending and the fake smile
I've been acting for quite awhile

Now I don't know which is true
For quite awhile I've been feeling blue
Feeling like I am not getting through
Everything feels old, nothing new.

When will I be myself again
I don't know I can't tell when
(sigh)What am I in this world for
What's my purpose, my truth, my call?

I started to write and could it be?
Is this what was destined for me?
Well here I am and I still pretend
Still not sure if I am happy or sad again.


© Olivia Williams