I’m desperately hanging on by your narcissistic strings of empowerment,
Pulling my limbs and ligaments tighter and tighter so I can’t escape your hypocritical force
You program me to spew out your angry words and your meaningless thoughts so people can throw rocks at me,
Stoning me until I’ve reached death
Of course,
The crowd laughs
Telling me how stupid and dumb I am because they’re too fucking dumb to realize that these aren’t my words or my thoughts
You paint your face in makeup and tell them I hit you
Beat you,
Put you into a word submission until you tapped out because,
Words hurt,
Right?
You make me dance and gyrate but mock me when I do it wrong
You tell me what to say and how to say it but only on your command
I cannot shower,
Bathe or brush my teeth until you order me to
I cannot eat,
Drink,
Sleep until you order me to do so
If I speak out of turn or say something you don’t like,
You’ll verbally and physically assault me until I’m on my knees begging for you to stop and submit to your Grace
Then,
You’ll tell me how I’m less of a man and how it’s you that must take control
You’ll mock my Autism
You’ll laugh at my mannerisms
And,
You’ll cry whenever I do something good just so you can keep the attention
I’m your sex machine and if I break or decide I need to rejuvenate,
I’m worthless and you’ll start to wonder if I’m gay or not even though I’ve given you everything I have and I just want rest but to you,
I’m a test dummy
I’m no man in your eyes and the first time I try to pretend that I am,
You remind me who my master is


© Ray