I didnt mean to fight
I didnt mean to shout
I wish I made your world bright
But I know it leaves you with doubt
When we fight I know I'm pretty much always the cause
But Its actually me who gets more hurt after starting these wars
The trembling feeling crawling through my skin
Of you walking out and my breakdowns begin
A spider spinning webs of thought all inside my head
Ones I can't handle but the spider he threads
Ones so negative like wishing I was dead
Wishing I could maybe go back in time and not say the things I said
Seeing you hurt makes my stomach turn
It breaks me to pieces but I just never learn
I never seem to learn how to actually communicate how I feel
Without having this spider spin the sowing wheel
Curling my insides and I end up lashing out as these don't only begin after I shout
It starts before and I lash out in fear
The thoughts so loud I can't keep the noise in
This spiders so deadly I end up spitting out its poison
© Thesaddneedpoet