I carry
Things that I should bury
Weighing me down
Bringing me lower to the ground
But I can’t let it go
Too scary
To step into the unknown
When fear and pain are all I’ve known
The light seems too bright
And I’m used to the dark lurking
On the other side
The day always outshadowed by the night
The moments I feel happy
Varies
Emotions trapped inside like a canary
Because guilt and shame
Stuck to joy like glue
So to shut down was all I could do
Become numb
Become grey
Let all the feelings fade
So the pain wouldn’t stay
Tiptoeing around my heart
Wary
That if I allowed myself to feel
A door would open that could not close
A stream would pour and always flow
So I parried
Avoided it all until I was nearly
Empty
For repression only caused regression
I had to realize
Flashbacks weren’t the past attacking
But the past demanding
To be remembered
Acknowledged
Memories fighting for closure
With the cure being exposure
To turn around and face
What I couldn’t burn away
And by walking through the flames
The purification began
The fire on my skin was healing
The scars finally pealing
Away to reveal
Flesh brand new
Streaming
Tears dripping on my cheeks
Like morning dew
The skies not grey it’s finally blue
And above me rises the sun
The rays engulf me
The warmth restores me
No longer heavy but
Airy
Joy, the sweetest berry
And I finally can savor her taste
This journey was not a waste
Not a waste
Not a waste
but
Necessary
The heaviest load let go

@TheFuriousPoet

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