In my heart,
I have seen myself struggle tears
I have seen my frowned face
I have witnessed broken pieces
I have heard screams and wrath
I have seen myself fall apart again and again.
I have seen my soul leave

I have had unbandaged wounds
I have fought worries and anxieties
I have had words go unspoken
I have cursed my choices.
I have seen regrets devour me
In my heart have watched silence defeat me
In my heart have felt loneliness.

But them,
They see smiles and laughs on the outside
They see a beautiful and sound woman
They see a substantial woman
They see a joyous soul.

What they can't see
is how damaged I am
I don't belong to myself anymore
I don't know who I am.
I'm lost in my heart.
© Virginia mule