Days have passed since that day I’ve given up on you.

The minutes build up to passing hours, yet my heart took it as an eternity of yearning for your soul. I looked for you everywhere, from the books I read, to the posts I scroll. I looked for you in the clothes I wore, and the hair you loved to ruffle. Given the circumstances, It was my own fault things went this way; it was ours, but I was the one who chose to end it. So why must it hurt so much? Why do I miss you more? Why am I the one sad when you aren’t.
I haven’t smiled since, nor have I laughed, or dressed the same. I dont really look different but I certainly am. My feelings aren’t genuine, I just need to pretend.
I called you for a stupid reason, I called because I needed to hear your voice. Of course I didn’t tell you that, instead I called you for something else. We ended up talking for hours, laughing as if it were the first time. Smiling so much and so big, my face hurts from the new stretch marks. It was about 4am, we had to head to bed at some point. I didn’t want it to end, but it had to.
I missed you, and I didn’t realize how hard it was to be without you in my arms. How hard it would be not hearing your voice anymore, or the nicknames you gave me, like I have given you.
I missed this, I did, and I do.
I was starved from you, but it is far too long.
It’s sad that we needed this to wake up to what things really are, we only tolerated each other, never loved.
Until next time,
© grey:D