I knew it, I knew it all.
How you weren't good for me.
How you would shatter me and leave me scattered all over the place like pieces of glass.
I knew you would slowly hammer my heart.
But I let you, I let you do it all.
Because I was in pain.
In so much pain that you became my unsafe haven.
I was so empty and I really needed someone to fill me up.
And even if I was aware I already had several holes.
I let you open up more of these holes.
And drain the slightest that was left within me.
Because as toxic as our love was.
As detrimental as it became.
It kept me distracted from what was actually destroying me.
And that was all that really mattered.
© janet k.