Does your granny lose layers while she's cooking?
Mine did— it always started with just one shoe
One minute, she was quite orderly-looking
One hell of a beauty most of the way through
The longer that granny cooked, the worse she looked
Down that shoe, both sleeves packed full of fresh tissue

Sweating all over her handwritten cookbook
Don't even get me started on her hairdo
Ten minutes beforehand, she had looked textbook
Then suddenly mug shot was far more the view
Singing way out of tune— forgetting the...