When I'm the sadness I feel
Happy thoughts elude me
When I'm my own disappointment
everything I do seem lacking
when I hate myself
loving others seems like a dream

When I'm my own heartache
The cause of my heartbreak
my happiness shatters right in my face
the thought of anything eludes me
I hate the situation as well as myself
change seems impossible

When everything makes me sad
the thought of hope seems delusional
I'm lost in unending sadness
even the people who made me happy
makes me sad
And everything has lost the glamour they used to have.

In this despair, I can choose
to be consumed by my disappointment and sadness
to not feel happy
or to find happiness of my own.
my mind, my control system
I can control my emotions and focus on the happy ones.
change is not so far fetched.
© maryann_t