I've always been enthralled by the fantasy of a new beginning.
One where I'm who I want to be and who I am doesn't exist.
The one with a sun to grow plants and not the one that withers them.
But I've been down this road before,
and the flickering lights and cracks remain the same each time.
People say it's the road that leads to sanity and sanctity.
I say it's darn near the darkest road I've have ever walked down.
On this road, I am left to the devices of pain as I swim through the phantom seas of despair.
And when all has been said and done, I am left alone in my maze of thoughts to search for answers only to be know by the quest of the gods.
I am left with more questions and the burden of truth and falsifiability.
The simple truth is, I've been insane more than half my life, and the other half I've spent bordering on insanity.
So during dark night when the sun has set, I once again walk through the dark maze on a god's quest.
And then the truths of the the day are revealed to me.
It Is to this effect, that I recognise the honesty of that fantasy and the faults of my faithlessness.
But time and I merely fleeting acquaintances.
For it is morning already, and my journey through this maze has come to an end.
And definitely like always, I have taken the familiar wrong turns here and there and so now, like always I am standing with no way back at the door of my longtime friends.
Rather faithful my friends are,
Destitution and absolute madness.

© Mae