It's hard to explain the emotions and pain
When my mother died it felt the world had stopped spinning like life would be never be the same
What's worse though is she gave her heart and everything away
Yet these people she did everything for in reality didn't truly care
What has happened to people who even share blood
It's like everyone is more worried about money status and are cold and don't truly love
She has been forgotten by many but never me
I struggle to let go and forgive those around me
I cannot comprehend the coldness of those who are supposed to be of my family tree
She lies in the box no funeral no flowers where no one can see
Her last months had more purpose than many of those with a full lifetime
Yet cancer had a plan
It was a destiny unplanned
I have to let go
I can't be eaten up with the bitter or the cold
I refuse to give in and nuture this pain
If my mother could forgive their absence and coldness I can do the same
Pain and guilt often hit my soul
Watching my mother rapidly growing old ate away at my soul
It haunts me often that now she's not remembered she has no name
Ashes to ashes dust to dust
Reality strikes
Holding hands and smiling even in pain
I know life moves on
The world spins and things change
I guess the whole point is losing someone who so giving made the world kind of change
© Isabel Page