I know I am messed up inside
I feel like it can't be fixed
I just don't think all the pills can fix the pain in my heart
So I guess it is pointless
I lay in the dark in my sorrow, today I just gave it my all
But there isn't enough for tomorrow
Because I am tired of the pain, I am tired of fighting
And they say it gets better, but it's been forever
So I don't think I believe it
It properly gets better with time, but I won't be here to see it
But please don't be mad
It's not that I am weak, I am just tired
But life isn't fair I know,
I hate that I am broken
I hate that I fell like a mistake
I hate when I am talking to God
I feel like He don't listen in times when I pray
I hate that I look in the mirror
And I hate the boy lookin' back
I just wish you'd understand
Mama, please don't be mad
I know what I am doing ain't right
Your son isn't perfect
but i am not a fighter, I want you to know that I tried
I want you to know that I love you
But lately, I don't feel like me
It was nothing that you did, you did what you could
And this isn't because I am depressed
It's 'cause I feel so alone
It's 'cause I feel like a burden
I've always felt like the problem, and that's why everyone leaves
But I'm sorry, I know you wanted what's best for me
The world has been taking my soul
But I leave you everything left in me
I love you forever and always
To the moment that you know I am gone
That moment is sooner than later
I love you, Mama


© Kyeremanten