I'm not 3 anymore; mom doesn't wake me up and dress me for school.
Wearing dad's clothes, glasses is not considered cool.
I don't check if the moon follows me.
Now I understand mom stops me for my safety.
 
I'm not 8; but I still struggle to finish up the food on my plate.
I don't get bullied anymore, but still friendless and lonely.
I now know the boy who used to hit me back in primary school, didn't really hate me.
 
I'm not 11; when my insecurities began.
The time when I lost all innocence and felt it was my fault
I'm still overly emotional; I do know how to carry myself better yet.
These are the things I'm still learning, but at least I don't hate what I see in the mirror.
Getting myself a friend is the least of my worries.
I still have daydreams though...
 
I'm not 15; I don't crush on every guy.
I still don't know what my type is, but I don't crush on every guy i make contact with.
I live in the present, less concerned about the future.
 
I'm not 17; I don't put myself down.
I'm less scared of things that used to frighten me.
I don't watch romantic movies obsessively.

I'm no longer 20
When I felt I was due to like a boy
I care less about such things,
I'm healing my scars little by little.
Letting my inner child finally breathe.

I'll be 23 soon. I wonder the things I'd leave behind.

There have been good and bad times.
But definitely not worst times.

Happy new Year 🎊

© camvickbone