Sitting down alone.
Who can lift my spirits?
Wondering who cares about me?
Your friends treat you like crap.
Just cause your an extrovert.
I'm shamed about who I am.
I cry.
I sit.
I look.
My anxiety makes me quiver.
I feel sick to my stomach.
I shake, I groan.
I'm woozy.
Why?
All my family says I'm great but if I was great then where are my friends.
Tears fill my eyes.
But I am unable to cry.
Words feel as if they can't escape my mouth.
I'm to weak.
As my lip quivers and my hands shake, I turn pale and close my eyes trying to go to another world.
I am lifeless.
No emotion is in my face.
I'm numb.
I'm told to have faith.
But I have none.
Faith in what I ask.
To have friends you have already hit rock bottom so nothing will get worse I am told.
I start to believe that I reach out.
No response.
When I think I've hit rock bottom and it can't get worse, it does.
I live in fear.
I dont sleep.
My eyes wont rest they wont close.
Eating food is sickening to me.
Are you anorexic people ask.
No I say.
I'm accused of being anorexic.
Eat, your as skinny as a stick my "friends" say as the look into my eyes.
I feel like I will nv succeed in your eyes.
Do you realize that your words hurt me?
Do you know how much your hurtful words stay inside my head?
If you knew what you said would go straight to my head what would you stay instead?
I have no others words to stay but...
Why?
Why?
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