not soft
not comfortable
a truth no velvet sheets can change

too long
too often
avoiding what I dared not face

as reality's monstrosity remains,
unyielding problems multiply incessantly

no soft embrace to be encased in
only walls of stone
cold, rigid, insurmountable
I claw, I slip, I fall
onto the mattress

and I sink deeper
a dozen pillows but no cushion to lay my head upon
should I close my eyes and try to sleep?

a starless night looms
still - it's too early to call it a day

yet when I tell my legs to move they do not yield
instead my hands pull the blanket over me
there it lands and lays heavy on my chest
pressing down, stifling breath

and so I remain
aware that I have to wake up, before I can fall asleep


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© poubelle