do you ever get tired
of looking your head to the sky
and feeling its gaze
and wondering why

wondering why
you can't seem to fight
why your arm always stops
right before you strike

you wonder why
you keep it all inside
the clouds in your brain
still storming on

you want to go batshit
you want to get hurt
you want to feel the dirt
and worse

you know that you can't
you know that you'd cry
you know that you'd be hopeless
if you ever had to try

to fight and break
and bruise and scream
and use all the strength
you've lost in sleeping

sleeping and sleeping
where'd your energy go
you can't do anything
and yet you go

you go to the rooftop
and shout with your lungs
but that rooftop is fake
and those lungs are close

you keep it inside
and you continue to cry
go about your day
and wish you could fly

fly up and up
and never come down
fly up and fall
but never hit the ground

because you know
you're afraid of the pain
sometimes you just
don't want to feel again

and sometimes
it's all you want - to feel
to let it all out
to finally be free.