Wanting to change, is often just not enough,
When the life you have led has been painful and tough.
Stuck in a pattern of self loathing and hate,
Is not easy to leave, it's like challenging fate.

I'm told that karma always has the last say,
I'll take what is coming, I'll not stand in the way.
Plagued by the images of people I've hurt,
Makes suicide appealing, so I toy and I flirt.

Truth...