to day I awoke to the smell of tree smoke tho my day is afternoon I know that I am not immune to painful thoughts as the memories of you further infect my brain coursing through my vains your memory remains the constant taping at my door like the raven never more I scream never never more !!!! the man I once loved is never more for he is the reaction of the man he once was whatever that was for a saw a sad sick boy who saw me as such a lovely toy a beautiful thing that could become more called me little girl when you where angery just like my dad truth is my dad wasn't a man and nor where you I cling to the breast of a broken man fighting every day wising to bot fail him like every one in history the horrific visions of his past...