When I say I am broken...i mean I am broken. I don't mean the type of "Oh I'm broken please help me"

I mean I'm broken to the point that if this switch was to slip I wouldn't even flinch, I'm shattered and every piece of me that was caring is scattered amongst those who lied and said that I mattered

I have no emotion I'm cold and I don't mean the way everyone these days mean it, with them thinking it's "savage" and "cool" to say

I mean it as I'm numb I can't a feel thing no more I'm emotionless, my hearts beating in a vast emptiness and I can't pull back from it

I'm stuck in a loop of repeated defeat and I'm exaughsted I just want to escape this numbness even if it means I feeling depression at least it would be something but I just feel nothing and I can't bring myself to ask for the help when the help is always me

Why can I pick up them when they fall but I can't find a stable grounding to place myself on? Now I guess that's the question the answer is missing

© It's Odessa