What do you want from me?

Do you want to see me cry and scream?

Is that the only way for you to confirm whether or not I mean anything?

I know I don’t tell you my thoughts,
But I write them instead, believe it or not

You never witness me struggling because I process my emotions in my own way;
I write to release my pain so I can handle living through another day.

Looking at you is a nightmare I’m forced to live out while awake,
Because all it does is remind me of how good happiness can feel, even if it’s fake.



I made a promise to myself that I’ll never show you what I’m going through;
In fact, if you ever see me emotional, it’s probably because you gave me a wound that’s brand new.

Avoiding you when that happens is the only way for it to start healing,
Since being around you only forces the skin to keep peeling.

You know how to rub salt into the wound as it continues to deepen,
So don’t blame me when the silence between us is a cliff that continues to steepen.

I always find myself stuck near the edge,
Fighting the urge to talk to you and bring things back like I never left.

And whenever I slip past that line, I only find myself falling,
Not deeper in love, but in a problem that lacks resolving.

We can never understand each other if you refuse to listen,
So live watching me in my silence, holding back the tears that glisten.
© Grinchy