Oh, how I wish I could be better.
how I wish I wouldn't get jealous
or sad
or angry
when I see you talking to them.
Yet I'm just wired this way, made to
break at the slightly movement.
I shatter at your words and
I wish I wouldn't.

I just can't stand it,
the way you lean towards them,
the way you giggle at their words,
things you never do for me.

Maybe I just can't believe you'd love me,
of all people.
Yet my thoughts are still spiraling and you
are still moving away.
Tears spill from my cheeks and
my chest rises up and down,
yet I have no one's hand to hold.
I have no one near me,
because it'll always just be me.

I wish I wouldn't feel this way,
because you tell me the sweet words
I'd like to hear.
I just can't bring myself to believe them.

My whole world flips upside down at every single word, and
I just can't control it.

Is it too much to ask,
for you to act the same way around me?
You say you enjoy the sound of my voice,
my so-called 'sweet' voice.
If so, why don't you ever listen as intently as you
do with them?

I cannot go a day without
considering if this was a mistake.
If fantasizing about the feeling of your lips on mine,
or dreaming about holding you against me,
if any of this was an error on my part.
© AceNeverExistedd.