I have been

holding

my breath
for days

720 hours
43,200 minutes

and each day
that has passed

has felt like
a never ending year
on repeat

a loop of
endless impossible
a slow revolve

My axis
tilted
my days
heavy

I have chosen
my words
carefully

with deep thought
and swear to God
honesty

I put them
down
on pretty paper

in a myriad
of interesting
colors

and I have meant
every f--king word

written by my hand

No words
crossed out
nor erased

they are felt

deeply

I have written

pages
upon
pages

in this
my unbreathing time

that will go
unread
ignored

until I can
breathe again

Those pages
with your name
written

are yours

I have found
clarity

within

upside down
restlessness

Waiting requires
an overabundance
of patience

that
is all
I have

© abeautifulchaos