I be having nightmares.  Twisting and turning in my  cell.
Whimpering an  heating up.
The gun in my hand. Shaking  bloodied to shoot my other part of myself in the head. It had that glowing pitch white imitating eyes. Whole  part of it whole side of it face infected. Stared at me leaning slowly forward. Hands gently on my bending knees. My recoil control was unstable.  Felt so  uneasy. Waken up in burst of hyperventilating. Coughed up to the edge of the bed recovering. Stood ahead my boss worried how far gone I was. Are you okay? You can decline anytime if things get to-" I stopped him right there.  " I ain't going anywhere. This where I need to be." How else could I even sleep? Last time I ran away, I let this happen." World took it course, I didn't join the fight. Lost in the matter of hours. Leaving not so much life.
Cowardice way out I will not take. You got it? He nod his head and told me about my mission. I sat on the edge of the bed to give a good listen. I was really concerned if you were ok," he spoke before I left out the door. This is alot on your shoulders. With people in your platoon that's on your side. Was scared just like you, but still participate to fight. " I'm fine, I said in tone of annoyance. Worry of the mission, not my health."  We been past that how I gotten myself in this situation in the first place." Stormed off out towards the long hallway. Grabbed whatever  weaponry that was in the clearway.  Seen myself out to the woman at the front desk. She was worried how sweet I was being so distressed awhile ago. She grows up so fast, anyone I have ever seen," he muttered.

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