I ghost in and out of who I am
Attentively drifting thru my own chaos
Whenever I reach out my hand it comes back to me bruised
Leaving them cold and untouched
Anger and grief set in as I try to warm them back up
The soldier in me, wounded
And dreading my return to front lines
Blurring my vision, the blueprint of my future unclear
I grow wearing of walking down this long and familiar path
The goal of positive stability to exhausting to pursue
I fear letting down those around me
My crippling guilt haunting me
Following me around, making its presents known
Casting a shadow so dark I can barely see what's in front of me
I stumble into walls I forgot I built
Swirling confusion takes hold and I'm left to fight against myself
Making it hard to protect people from my collateral damage