Hey, shut up I'm tryna tell 'em my story! I'm sorry, I wasn't yellin' at you guys I was talkin' to the voices singing in my head, it's a little bit twisted, I know that the person in the mirror's not a perfect one, I look at him every day and think he's not enough.

Now, where were we, oh well, my life's a book that I don't really like to open up, all these voices in my head get loud, wish that I could shut them out but they made me who I am, they also deceived me, I just wanna leave the negativity in my head and relief from my stress, I don't wanna see or have a bunch of people to impress 'cause gettin' too close to anyone could be dangerous, friends I had, now they act different, it's all switchin', it's pretty hard to watch those things you used to love turn to things that you wish you forgot real moments that make you question the things that you want's,

I'm wonderin' what's comin' next, with this rope pulldown hard on my throat, judge me might smile down on you in heaven but it ain't that funny life's like a merry-go-round and I'm still tryna figure it out, I don't fit in the crowds

To friends and families, you keep on talkin' to me like a stranger but we've been together since we're closer that we still are, I've been here for you, but how come you're never there for me? What I'm sayin' is me without you doesn't make any sense, know you're intense and controlling, but we need to learn how to cope with it, that's just the way that it is but how can we keep going at a rate like this? We can't, so I guess I'ma have to leave, please don't come after me, just wanna be alone right now, I don't like the prison you built me, door's locked, and the keys are in my hands, that's weird, it doesn't make sense, does it? "If you didn't want me to live in your house, you shouldn't have let me move in"

See my whole life I've been airin' it out, I'm gettin' into character now, this moment feels wrong to you, but it feels right to me, my feelings seal tight real nice, I will fight not anything to win, sing along to the pain, 'cause pain will always find its way to the surface no matter how deep you bury it. As a kid, I've been allowed to live life like I'm already grieving I'm at a table of liars and its hard not to eat what they feed me, this is crazy to me' Cause I thought you had me in prison this whole time, but I'm the one holdin' the keys, feels like we're on the edge right now, I guess I'm a disappointment, doin' everything I can, feels like I live in chapter one, I skim through it, I've been through it, I always felt like no one listened to me, what's the point in having conversation with somebody that won't remember we had conversations, we always talk about the same things, just that we say 'em different, that's too bad.

I just need some time, I'm tryna think straight, just need a moment in my own space sometimes I think back to the old days in the pointless conversations with you. What else can I offer to me, there's nothing left right now, I gave it all to you, feels like we're on the edge right now, what, are you scared of me leaving? That's embarassin' I mean this with love when I say you're probably already wasted, don't talk me down that's not gonna work now, I packed all my clothes and I moved out, I Would've figured things out but I guess I'm a letdown but it's cool, I checked out

I've always been motivated by comments from people I looked up to, tellin' me things they think I'll never be and, that's how I grew up, I felt in love with my pain and I slept with my regrets, joy said I'm cheating and its not coming back, family is where I found love, but it's also where I learned to judge, I had to learn there's a difference between what you want, and what you really need. That's pretty hard to digest and I told you I'd leave when we die, and we ain't died yet, well, back in the day when you and I had it all mapped out, now I'm tryna cut me out of it like I ain't never been a part of it, yet I am the heart of it.

There's so much that goes on in my head that people will never see, maybe this is the last day that I breath and the last day I see the sunset. If I die put my body in trash bag, don't waste your money on my gravestone I'm worried about my soul

Got my own shoes, I ain't tryna fit in yours, I'm just tryna be me, I am nobody else, I never been married, but I've felt divorced I'm not a fortune-teller, but I can see into the future better ain't no tellin' what'll happen when I pick up the rope, feels like it's gone forever my thoughts are funny, it feels like I'm onto something, my head's in the clouds, kinda like it up here; I am not comin' down

"it's comfortable here and I like it, I got my own room and everything, it don't get better than this, you probably be terrified of my memories but please don't, don't lecture me let me be, let me see, let me rest, you see, how they remember me doesn't alter who I am as a person to take my energy, hard days, cold nights staring down at my empty cup like, I'ma fill it up. I know the feeling of feeling like everything that you deal with don't ever change, and then go back to feeling like you out of your mind, seems like we're all trying to climb a ladder and it's crazy what we'll do to climb it faster, it's like we throw away the things in life that really matter just so we can make it to the top and wonder what we're even climbing after and that's part of being a human, we all want what we never had, right now death is on my wish list, the good life doesn't seem so bad.

I love you to death these are the moments I know I'ma always hold onto and cherish 'em, life's not about what you did, it's what you do, build on what you got and learn from what you lose and never let people distract you from being you.