In the quiet of night,
A war haults my slumber,
These weary thoughts
Which plunder
The peace kept in storage.
Struck with confliction
This awakening blow
Taped lightly on my skull,
Illuminating the feeble
Existence of my pursuits.
An inquiry
unsure of my convictions,
Scrutinising the fire
Warming my soul
From the cold reality
Which I was born.

"Is happiness,
This crave conditioned
by fantasy sellers,
Truly the goal?
This Glorified delusion
Eluding the proper
means to acquire it,
Emphasizing selfishness
and excitement,
Truly what I'm looking for?
This uncertain wave
prone to shifting atmospheres,
succumbing to the essence of seasons,
victim to celestial whims,
Must that be the corner stone
of my foundation?
This unsatisfied emotion,
Only quenched by knowing
Why I was called in the first place,
The product of being engulfed with calling,
Is only the crumbs of my purpose.

In the quiet of night,
It dawns..
I've chased the environment of my calling
where happiness grows from
Rather than the path to get there.
Understanding why the feeling flees
In the face of chaos,
And why brokenness returns and stares.

In the quiet of night
A whisper shatters the silence..
"You're not called to be happy,
Such aspirations
Are for the spiritually dead,
For they are engulfed in everything
That brings excitement to flesh,
Whatever that may be...
You're called for Dominance,
for change, for guidance,
To breath with courage
and bleed the unknown,
painting the world,
carving out its secrets
and bringing a kingdom to this earth...
My child happiness,
Is a lie feed first,
To rob you of the ability
To withstand the valley,
Make it through my child,
You'll find it and you'll just be,
A joy beyond understanding."

As morning unveils
I remain in wonder.


© fruitfulodyssey

#night #awareness #joy