They sat under the large tree together, the soft wind rustling the leaves above them. She glanced over at Chay, he was looking at her with an adoring smile. She turned away again, the sunset reflected off of her hair and eyes. “You know… I” began Chay, his head tilted up towards the brightly colored sky above. He closed his eyes.
“I’ve always hid something from you Aurra.” There was a moment of peaceful silence. She turned to him, he still wasn’t facing her. “What do you mean?” she asked. She feared those words from him. He took a deep breath, scared to ruin this perfect moment.
He looked to the ground.
“I don’t know how to say…the words…Aurra.”
She looked at him, her heart was pounding. She knew what was coming.
“Aurra, I like you.” He said. She looked at him, she could tell this was genuine. She knew for a while.
“We are good friends.” She mumbled, her voice trembling, wincing at those words.
“No Aurra, I… I mean I really like you…”
She looked up to the sky. Her heart ached in her chest.
“I really like you too,” she responded quietly. He looked at her.
“I love you, Aurra.” he said those words with a loving smile, but he was serious. The fear and love of those words lingered in the air. Tears welled up in Aurra’s eyes and there was a lump in her throat. She tried to swallow her feelings.
“Chay…” she began.
“Aurra, I know it’s a lot, but I’ve had feelings for you for as long as I can remember. I want us to be more than best friends.” He looked at her longingly, he knew this was going to hurt after her pause. He was losing hope.

“I’m sorry Chay…but I…”
“You don’t feel the same way yet I know, but you just need time, trust me. Soon you’ll realize that-”
“Chay it's hard to explain...I…”
“Aurra we are meant to be, it’s how it’s always been.”
“Chay!” yelled Aurra. “I can’t decide who.” Tears streamed down her face. He pulled back in shock. “Who?” he said.
“You….and Vincent.” Angry, he stood up. “You love him?!” he asked with a raised voice. “He is so cruel to you. Don’t you see? I would never hurt you Aurra, I protected you all those times and now…” He took another deep breath and sat back down. “and now I realize getting mad won’t change how you feel.” A tear streamed down his cheek. He quickly wiped it away and sat down again.
“I had no idea you felt that way…I’m so sorry Chay.” She looked at him desperately, his once joyous expression faded to pain.
“It’s alright Aurra.” He said, looking at her.
“So…you do have some feelings for me?” he asked, looking at her with hope. She moved in closer and hugged him tightly. “Are we still friends?” She asked, still embraced in the hug.
Chay’s heart sank with the dismissing answer. “Of course.” said Chay. He teared up, he knew this was the closest thing to having her. He never wanted to let go of her. She pulled back out of the hug. It was now dark outside and the stars shone brightly above. They looked at each other quickly, then looked away. “I should get going now…” she mumbled, getting up and brushing herself off. Chay didn’t answer, but simply gave her a kind smile and nodded. She smiled at him in return.

He watched as she walked away. He caved in, the tears flooded down his face, emotions taking over. He knew she was never going to choose him.

(internal thoughts)
You idiot. She will never love you, why would you even believe for a second that she felt the same way? She loves Vincent more than you. You're just a weakling, she wants a man. You see, things will never be the same. You and Aurra will drift further apart until she is gone for good…and the worst part…you're dying and you can’t even tell her. Life is so short, eh? You will die alone, and she won’t care, she’ll be in his arms. What is the point of even going on?

Chay winces in fear of the thought. His eyes were red and teary. He felt like a hole had grown in his chest where his heart once was. How will she ever learn to love me?
He slouches down under the tree. Slowly losing consciousness from exhaustion. One last tear rolls down his cheek, bright blue and glowing in the warm dark night.

© Can't Remember My Name