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My DMT Experience
It's said that music saves lives.
True.
There are different levels of healing, personally the best way is through music.
Specifically when music is played, I can feel as humming vibration throughout my entire body, and it's lead me to find consciousness. So when I say consciousness, I have to mention DMT. I am forever grateful for the experience.
After smoking DMT once, over two years ago and I am still learning from the experience.
A year ago, I sprinkled some on a bowl, I take 4 hits, put headphones in and had a 3 song lined up, of my favorites,
and it was like nothing I had ever imagined. It was perfect.
I can't put a single word out there to describe it.
But if I had to pick one word it would be beautiful and scary. It was sad as fuuuuck but I still I enjoyed every second of it.
So I take a few hits, and almost immediately I am feeling so heavy, and I start seeing tiny squares appearing out of my surroundings, they are rapidly growing, spinning and multiplying right in front of me. And out of those squares little spirals began to take form and are slowly pulsating to the rhythm of my heart beat.. They're beginning to get closer and closer, surrounding me and barely touching me. But when they do, the parts of skin and body are turned to dust! It was like blades of a knife but it wasn't painful, I was disappearing as this pulsating fractal circles and rotates towards me. Eventually my eyes are all that's left of me as they too are being shredded into pieces.
All goes black.
I feel myself falling, falling as if I were scattered bits of my body, all over this empty gigantic space, and even though I was dust, and could feel parts of myself disconnected but still together. In this separated free fall, I felt heavy, parts of my body felt weighted down, like an enormous amount of pressure had been placed on top of me. The dust settles and it's dark in the space I'm in and void of any structure, me being the dust, I could feel a sense of balance as I blanketed the vast area. The darkness began to stir and like a cool summer breeze it streamed up and around and through me, as if it was being swallowed up by something else. This void begins to rapidly grows and looks like a torso. Darkness moves over my shivering body as the final speck of black is gone from the space. I'm so cold at this point and notice that I am naked. And a infant. I start to crawl towards this haunting force that is getting further away from me and as it's moving away the hard surface beneath me has become a fleshy maze. Looking around I can see I am in a brain.... my brain. And I am a baby so I start silently screaming, from inside my own head, begging for my infant who is moving towards this fucking huge ominous thing, to stop and turn around, it's as if I had no control over me because despite all the screaming and pleading I'm still fucking crawling. (That part is hard to think about... I was, quite literally, outta control for a long time, the sheer powerlessness I felt that moment was like a fucking kick to the noggin, saying "Wake Up Bitch, you do this shit every day, have some patient and you'll see it ain't so bad!")
But the closer I get, the fear starts to fall away. I was struck with a new feeling. And as I navigate through my mind maze, I try to speak to tremendous force above me but I don't actually have a mouth.. By that point I have grown back into my orginal self but that's when the force had completely come together, taken it's shape. It had several arms, a head, and two legs.. also no mouth though.
I am assuming this is a deity/god, but I don't know but I still want to look up and see what this thing is. I begin to raise my head and, without cause, start crying uncontrollably and really quietly... That was really fucking creepy, seriously I cannot decipher if I was crying due to the inability to control my trip like I had been able to multiple times before or if this thing had made me like this? My sobbing subsides a bit when I am asked why I'm there. I don't know, I tell it. It tells me that i shouldn't be there and that if I had a question to ask him, that I should already know the answer. I feel like I don't know what it's getting at but before I can start to overanalyze the situation, it says "If you travel to ask then you have the answer, I cannot give you something which you possess. I do not want you here and I do not allow you to return. I will not give up on the progress made so I will ask one final time, WHY ARE YOU HERE? " I asked if I had really been there before. It was not amused. It said, and I will never forget this, "Be gone with you, you unforgiving imprint!"
The entire time we both spoke through mental thoughts.
It didn't have a mouth and neither did I.
For about six months I went through the trip over and over again, trying to examine every detail I could. I was convinced that I spoke to some sort of other worldly entity.
Now I have the open mindedness to see it for what it was... the black "thing" I encountered was my fear.
I had been transformed into a baby, the fact that I've had anxiety since I was a small child explains that particular part of my trip. And that I traveled through my mind, the message I heard and neither one of us never actually had a mouth to speak from. Very compelling, especially because I was literally talking to the fear that I had built up. I made my fear into a nightmare of a force. Being raised by a woman who was not showing me love or giving me anything worth of a functional childhood made me into a person who was so unsure of the world and every other person who inhabits it. But I'm working on that, and it is important to note that using the DMT, just once, had a hugely positive and profound impact on my life. I am not the same person I was two years ago.
It's not like I hate her, the me from my past was just trying her best to maintain whatever control she was willing to accept. I don't have any bad feelings about my past either, I spend a majority of my life hiding, running, or numbing my mind and thoughts. It's actually kinda funny when I think about it, I was fearful of something that I couldn't possibly changed. What's done is done and the past is just that, past and gone.
Thanx for reading and I hope you get to try DMT, i recommend it to everyone.
Much Love For You All
💙🔮💜💙🔮💜
True.
There are different levels of healing, personally the best way is through music.
Specifically when music is played, I can feel as humming vibration throughout my entire body, and it's lead me to find consciousness. So when I say consciousness, I have to mention DMT. I am forever grateful for the experience.
After smoking DMT once, over two years ago and I am still learning from the experience.
A year ago, I sprinkled some on a bowl, I take 4 hits, put headphones in and had a 3 song lined up, of my favorites,
and it was like nothing I had ever imagined. It was perfect.
I can't put a single word out there to describe it.
But if I had to pick one word it would be beautiful and scary. It was sad as fuuuuck but I still I enjoyed every second of it.
So I take a few hits, and almost immediately I am feeling so heavy, and I start seeing tiny squares appearing out of my surroundings, they are rapidly growing, spinning and multiplying right in front of me. And out of those squares little spirals began to take form and are slowly pulsating to the rhythm of my heart beat.. They're beginning to get closer and closer, surrounding me and barely touching me. But when they do, the parts of skin and body are turned to dust! It was like blades of a knife but it wasn't painful, I was disappearing as this pulsating fractal circles and rotates towards me. Eventually my eyes are all that's left of me as they too are being shredded into pieces.
All goes black.
I feel myself falling, falling as if I were scattered bits of my body, all over this empty gigantic space, and even though I was dust, and could feel parts of myself disconnected but still together. In this separated free fall, I felt heavy, parts of my body felt weighted down, like an enormous amount of pressure had been placed on top of me. The dust settles and it's dark in the space I'm in and void of any structure, me being the dust, I could feel a sense of balance as I blanketed the vast area. The darkness began to stir and like a cool summer breeze it streamed up and around and through me, as if it was being swallowed up by something else. This void begins to rapidly grows and looks like a torso. Darkness moves over my shivering body as the final speck of black is gone from the space. I'm so cold at this point and notice that I am naked. And a infant. I start to crawl towards this haunting force that is getting further away from me and as it's moving away the hard surface beneath me has become a fleshy maze. Looking around I can see I am in a brain.... my brain. And I am a baby so I start silently screaming, from inside my own head, begging for my infant who is moving towards this fucking huge ominous thing, to stop and turn around, it's as if I had no control over me because despite all the screaming and pleading I'm still fucking crawling. (That part is hard to think about... I was, quite literally, outta control for a long time, the sheer powerlessness I felt that moment was like a fucking kick to the noggin, saying "Wake Up Bitch, you do this shit every day, have some patient and you'll see it ain't so bad!")
But the closer I get, the fear starts to fall away. I was struck with a new feeling. And as I navigate through my mind maze, I try to speak to tremendous force above me but I don't actually have a mouth.. By that point I have grown back into my orginal self but that's when the force had completely come together, taken it's shape. It had several arms, a head, and two legs.. also no mouth though.
I am assuming this is a deity/god, but I don't know but I still want to look up and see what this thing is. I begin to raise my head and, without cause, start crying uncontrollably and really quietly... That was really fucking creepy, seriously I cannot decipher if I was crying due to the inability to control my trip like I had been able to multiple times before or if this thing had made me like this? My sobbing subsides a bit when I am asked why I'm there. I don't know, I tell it. It tells me that i shouldn't be there and that if I had a question to ask him, that I should already know the answer. I feel like I don't know what it's getting at but before I can start to overanalyze the situation, it says "If you travel to ask then you have the answer, I cannot give you something which you possess. I do not want you here and I do not allow you to return. I will not give up on the progress made so I will ask one final time, WHY ARE YOU HERE? " I asked if I had really been there before. It was not amused. It said, and I will never forget this, "Be gone with you, you unforgiving imprint!"
The entire time we both spoke through mental thoughts.
It didn't have a mouth and neither did I.
For about six months I went through the trip over and over again, trying to examine every detail I could. I was convinced that I spoke to some sort of other worldly entity.
Now I have the open mindedness to see it for what it was... the black "thing" I encountered was my fear.
I had been transformed into a baby, the fact that I've had anxiety since I was a small child explains that particular part of my trip. And that I traveled through my mind, the message I heard and neither one of us never actually had a mouth to speak from. Very compelling, especially because I was literally talking to the fear that I had built up. I made my fear into a nightmare of a force. Being raised by a woman who was not showing me love or giving me anything worth of a functional childhood made me into a person who was so unsure of the world and every other person who inhabits it. But I'm working on that, and it is important to note that using the DMT, just once, had a hugely positive and profound impact on my life. I am not the same person I was two years ago.
It's not like I hate her, the me from my past was just trying her best to maintain whatever control she was willing to accept. I don't have any bad feelings about my past either, I spend a majority of my life hiding, running, or numbing my mind and thoughts. It's actually kinda funny when I think about it, I was fearful of something that I couldn't possibly changed. What's done is done and the past is just that, past and gone.
Thanx for reading and I hope you get to try DMT, i recommend it to everyone.
Much Love For You All
💙🔮💜💙🔮💜
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