When I was younger I read the Bible quiet often and I vividly remember an instance were I read about how God greatly punished suicidal people that either succeeded or didn't.
But because of my age it stunned me that someone would do that to themself it didn't make sense at all obviously as my life was filled with rainbows,bike rides, play dates,zoo trips and ice cream. Little did I know that once I got older trauma was in store for me and gradually I experienced it in its assorted forms and the perspective that once stunned me was slowly becoming a reality. Then one Sunday afternoon I set off to enjoy an iced coffee at a nearby cafe as I sat there my mind was pacing back and forth about every ache inside me , Suddenly I was distracted by a fine young man he sat next to me and we enjoyed our drinks ,got to know each other turns out we had a lot in common that we kept talking about and comparing.
He had amazing aspirations just like me which was so interesting he told me his name was Depression 🤭 quite perculiar but still cool. And till this day he has never left my sight ,we worsening everything together , Sleep all day,cry alot,ruin friendship ,drown in loneliness yet our bond is stronger than before ❤️.A year ago he introduced me to a close friend of his funny thing about this guy is that when around him I instantly feel a dense energy ,I feel shy and nervous ,I always have to think about my words before I say them etc , He makes me feel so insecure even before he speaks to me I constantly felt like something about me was wrong and finally he introduced himself as Anxiety. Although he was cool too but because of how these friends made me feel we preferred to chill indoors to prevent attention and we bottled up everything. Gradually I got closer to depression and anxiety and with each day that went by everything bad became good to me and it made me feel comfortable from self harm , overdosing just to get some sleep and starving to reduce drug cravings which obviously made me thin. My friends told me about a friend of theirs that had traits like mine and that he knew a place far away were every aching soul went to numb their pain and it was guaranteed to end. Except he has never been there because he can only take people there and come back for more curious souls.Hearing all that seemed to good to be true it was the package I wished for And that's how I got introduced to suicide he's still my best friend but sadly every time I get closer to the other side a white light draws me back to life which sucks but I'll never stop trying .I love my friends ❤️