TRAUMAS.

I don't go sitting on Bikes, (Not farm Bikes, Motor Cycles or power Bikes).

Not even recreationally.

My Husband is a Biker.

He owns several power Bikes and he even has the Hali Davidson.

He goes for the annual power Bikes competition organised in any State of Nigeira.

But then;

I have paranoia.

You see, up until 1999,

This same Bikes,

It was my only means of transportation.

I was so comfortable on it.

I mean, I had no reason to fear, I had been climbing it for more than 3 years by this time.

I was a pro Bike climber.

Everyone that went to Ogun State University in the 90s can attest to the fact that, It was almost our only means of transportation in those days.

The Buses were always full.

The smaller taxis were also always filled from Ijebu Igbo Bus parks, before getting to Ago Iwoye.

So it will practically cruise along our route while we wait for transport to school for our lectures.

The classes were timed.

So we look for the best Bikes with a well cushioned seat and then we hop on in and get to our destination very fast.

Quite a dangerous but such fun adventure.

But on this faithful day;

I had gone to Ijebu Igbo with my then bobo, it was for a Birthday party of someone, a girl that was dating my Boyfriend's friend.

It was almost midnight, and we had left the party, so he (my Boyfriend) had gotten two Bikes and placed yours truly on one and then he took the other one.

My Bike man, he sped off once he was told where we were heading to.

Think&Thank Hostel.

Thinking back now, my Bike man, his breath, It reeked of alcohol, but I was too young to have concluded that It was such a huge problem.

Oh, but it was.

As we went pass Oru and made for the road that will open up to Ita Merin, the guy started to meander across the road like a crooked river trail.

So I panicked and still thinking I was talking to a normal, unaccompanied with the demons that follows alcohol human;

I said quietly "ę ro rá oooo" ("be careful please") in almost a whisper, I was soon to find out that I was talking to my clueless sober self.

Because he was speeding so much that we had to take a cautionary break for a car to pass, and he did this by actually applying the pedal responsible for it.

The bike suddenly took a hike in to the sky, and threw me and of course my almost unconscious bike driver along with it.

I landed in the Bush, on the right side of the road just before it opens up to the White Angels Hostel.

I hit my head on a heavy rock inside the Bush, because I felt several sharp pains and everything went black, suddenly there was nothing.

I had fainted off or so.

But it must have been for a few seconds.

Because, I woke up with no feelings.

Meanwhile, I had already seen the movie 'Ghost' (with Patrick Swaze and Demi Moore).

When I woke up, and opened my eyes in the darkness, I simply assumed it was my spirit.

So I just got up and broke into a mad run heading for no where in particular.

I shot pass the bike man who was still oblivious but heavily injured and sitting by the road side.

I presumed he was trying to make some little sense of what just happened to all of us, including the alcohol demons inside his head.

Then I stopped suddenly!

This was back at the Ita Merin junction;

That was when my Boyfriend and his own Bike man spotted me on the road, I was hysterical, tugging maniacally at my weave- on and screaming "my head! my head! my head!.

I remember that my bobo just ran to my side and held on tightly to me, people had gathered and they told him that;

O sare buruku de bę yęn nii ooo, dii mu gan, ma jè ko dubulę ooooo.

(She ran very fast to that spot like a mad person, hold on to her very tight, do not allow her to lie down).

That he should hold me up and prevent my hitting the ground suddenly, as it could cause instant death!.

So he held on tight, while I kept trying to squeeze off him, pushing at his arms in an urgent manner, I just needed to lie down so bad.

We both fell to the floor while he made sure I did not get to lie down.

We were both bloodied.

There was blood on my face and it was coming from the right side of my forehead and just below my left eye, up above the cheek bone, and the one on my arm, was coming from my left elbow.

The one on my right Knee was from the bruises I sustained there.

Writing this now, I just smiled as I had to look at my elbow and knees to know the exact ones that carries the scars.

Time does heal wounds,

All the scars were right there, but very faint now.

You have to look closely at my left under eye to see the bruised scar there.

I finally sat down and broke into a heavy sob, the tears ran freely down my crimsoned face.

I couldn't explain the heavy consistent pains in my head.

I didn't know how badly the bike man was injured, but I hear it was way worse than mine, the Bike shattered.

At the Hospital, my weave-on was removed so that my head could be examined.

The wound was not physical on my scalp, it was inside my head.

So the Doctor advised an x-ray to my head and entire body.

He gave me some analgesics and they dressed my face and body wounds.

I will woke up the next day stiffened and I could barely move my head. I felt a sharp searing pain in the middle and back of my head.

I felt miserable and in so much pains everywhere.

When the Bike threw me up, I remember going blank, and I saw nothing, just blank, black.

Later, I will keep thinking it was a good thing that I am vain and I always fix full heavy weaves, so the weaves cushioned some of the blow to the head.

The x-ray showed that my body was fine but I had broken my skull in the middle and in the back.

The result showed a forceful opening in the middle and back of my skull.

Though young, but I was grown enough to be worried.

The medical terms shown on my X-ray result was;

' Minimal diastasis of the lumbosacral and the Cambodia sutures, intracranial pressure increased'

It was luckily a linear fracture. Single fracture lines in two places.

Straight forceful opening in the middle and back of my skull, no broken skin of the skull.

I stopped sleeping, my eyes were always wide open and the headaches never stops.

Then my eyes kept conjurring on liquids like a well of oceans.

I was always burning up with fever.

There were bruises on my face and skin and the healing of those also, was not convenient, but then my head needed the most attention.

I needed it to read and pass my exams to be a graduate.

I visited several specialist Hospitals.

I remember, that the specialist in one Hospital in Ijebu-ode adviced me to remove all the last teeth in my mouth, all sides, up and down.

They will grow very big and put pressure on the jaw, by pushing on the other ones, he said.

So to reduce possible future pressure to the head, they should all four be removed.

Since they cannot heal an opening in the skull for someone my age. They adviced that I can only take calcium drugs to build back the bones to possibly come back closer.

I was placed on calcium drugs and semi skimmed milk.

The headaches, it persisted.

I was practically on drugs.

I was finally referred to a neurologist at the psychiatrist home in Abeokuta.

The Aro mental Home, to check the extent of the damage to my skull.

It was here that I saw first hand, ( what happens to a woman who couldn't handle child labour pains, some die I have heard.

But these ones, several of them, they didn't die, their mind, it simply snapped with the extent of the labour pains).

They ran mad.

My people call it Ábisiwiń (Born child&run mad).

The Neurologist, he placed me on several drugs, but the one I can never forget of the lot, was valium 10.

I was given this because of the Insomnia.

The effects of taking valium 10 is that, it knocks you out completely, and haven been trained with several beatings for so many years, to always get up to urinate from deep sleep;

I will spend several months of my life always going head on gbagbos all over the doors of the house, or where ever I lay my head.

Sometimes, I sleep walk to the bathroom and back to Bed, and by morning, I will find my self lying on the floor of the kitchen, the sitting room, the second sitting room or the corridor of the house, both sides of the house.

My late step mum will sometimes come and lie by my side till I open my eyes, checking to see if I am burning up or If it's just sleep delusions.

It was indeed a nightmarish time of my young life.

To minimise the headaches and eyes tearing up, I could only read while lying down and resting my head on a pillow, face up.

If I try to bend my head by sitting in a chair to place my book on the table, the headaches comes swooning in, and my eyes starts to water up.

My then Boyfriend is on this media wall somewhere, he was devastated with the possibility of some irreparable damages to my head.

With all our terrible two fighting like siblings; at this period however, he was always doting on me like a father.

I wasn't always some exteme brilliant student, but the head injury did Its number on me.

Even till this day, when the headaches comes, I go all dizzy, and everything becomes blurry, I lose my balance, and I suddenly feel like everything is in fast forward.

I can't really explain the actual feelings in words, but sometimes, my actions are way slower than my mind dictates.

I slowly tell my mind ( using my mind and my heart) to;

'Slow down, steady 'Slow down 'steady' 'steady , steady, steady'.

It's amazing what my mind already concludes before my actual action carry it out.

The first time I saw a real description of what my mind does sometimes, was when I saw Berry Allen move in the Flash!

My mind sometimes takes on the speed of 'The Flash', even while I am motionless.

I see several things to be fixed all at once.

My OCD level is on a thousand percent.

I have refused to sit on a Bike till this day.

Ever since the accident in 1999.

*****

When I got married.

My Husband, having told him the stories of my Bike accident, the skull fracture and the trauma.

He normally tease on me by referring to me as a vampire.

This is because I will rather stay in the dark, and I flinch when he switches on the light in the room.

It triggers my headaches.
He was so worried about how the headaches will treat me during child bearing labour.

Almost insisting on elective ceaserian.

Giving birth was trying times for me yes.

On my second pregnancy, my headaches literally gave me face pains, there were veins running across my forehead and nose.

I stopped at two children.

I might as well.

If you know me well enough, then you know the rest.

©Ibadi'aran Omo Akinde

#recounts
#traumamemoirs
#headblows
#fractures
#curvedballs









N:B

The skull can break, or fracture, if it is subject to a direct and forceful impact.

The underlying cause of a skull fracture is a head trauma that is significant enough to break at least one bone.

People with a skull fracture need treating as soon as possible.

Skull fractures can vary in severity, and the extent of the injury depends on:

• The affected bone or bones.
• How deep the fracture is.
• Whether or not the fracture also affects the skin, blood vessels, sinuses, and mucous membranes.

Skull fractures can either be linear, which means that they have a single fracture line, or communicated, where multiple fracture lines are present.

It is also possible to describe fractures as either open or closed.

An open fracture, also called a compound fracture, is one where there is a break in the skin or an open wound near the fracture.

In a closed fracture, the bone will not penetrate the skin.

What are the symptoms?

The symptoms of a skull fracture may include:

• A headache or pain at the point of impact.
• A bump or bruise.
• Bleeding from a wound.
• Bleeding from the ears, nose, or eyes.
• Clear fluid leaking from the ears or nose.
• Bruising behind the ears or under the eyes.
• Feeling drowsy, confused, or irritable.
• Loss of speech or slurred speech.
• Difficulty swallowing.
• Loss of balance.
• Impaired vision.
• Changes in the pupils, such as becoming dilated or not reacting to light.
• Convulsions.
• Becoming unconscious.
• Feeling sick or throwing up.
• A stiff neck.
• Swelling.
• Difficulty breathing.
• Numbness or paralysis.
• A slow pulse.
• Ringing in the ears or difficulty hearing.
• Facial weakness.
• Loss of bowel or bladder control.

© Ibadiaran Omo Akinde