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THE PRICE OF BEAUTY
Layla sat by the pond near the forest , dipping her feet in the water and taking in the coolness of it. This was a place that was immensely sacred to her. For as long as she can remember, she has spent her time sitting by the exact spot, enjoying the sight of the trees and the birds and the sunset. She found company in the stillness. It may sound strange to any sane person but she has had more conversations with the birds and the trees than with people around her. It is not as if she despises people or their company. On the contrary, it was the people who seemed to scorn her. The reason for such hatred was quite simple. People refused to talk to her because of her face. She was, what they called 'ugly' and the mere sight of her often seemed to give them horrors. She never understood how any of this was her fault. She was born, unfortunately and unintentionally, with an unnaturally large scar that covered the entire left side of her face.

Her mother died soon after her birth and since then her Baba never failed to remind her that their misfortune was entirely her fault. It's a different fact that the doctor himself said that she had a weak heart which was the cause of her demise. Layla wouldn't say that she was unloved. But love and pity aren't always the same thing now, are they? Her aunts from her mother's side seemed to care for her but their efforts were evidently pitiful. They always appeared to weigh their words while talking to her. She has heard them talk in whispers when they thought she wasn't listening. They worry that she would die alone without knowing love and affection. She found their worries ironic considering that they never extended any shred of love and affection towards her either.

She often pondered over these thoughts while passing her time by the pond. Presently, she adjusted her foggy eyes towards the horizon where the sun had turned orange. She was always awed by the way the colours of the sky and the sun turned different shades through the course of the day. People wouldn't have appreciated mother nature if she wasn't so aesthetically beautiful. Layla sometimes imagined herself becoming a butterfly or a flower so that people would appreciate her. Imagination was one thing she excelled at and it was the only thing that made her otherwise lonely and boring life, appealing. She fantasized about travelling to a faraway place where everything and everybody looked as hideous as her. A place where nobody can scorn or pity her because they would all be equal there. Sometimes she imagined being born as a princess who was so pretty that people paid money just to get a glimpse of her face. As she started her daily ritual of imagining the impossible that day, she caught sight of a middle aged woman approaching her near the pond. She tensed at the unusual sight. People didn't usually come here at this time and most importantly people didn't come towards her. Out of the corner of her eyes, she watched the woman warily as she kept increasing her paces towards Layla. She expected the woman to just pass by her but surprisingly, the woman addressed her.
"What are you doing here, child?"

Layla took almost a full minute to register her shock before replying, "I often spend time here". Alone. She didn't add that for some reason.
The woman let her eyes wander for a moment, probably taking in the sight of her surrounding, before dropping down to sit beside Layla. Once again Layla felt uneasy at the unexpected addition to her little lonely picnic but she said nothing. She had to admit that she was quite curious of the strange woman. She wore a loose white gown and she was neither very pretty nor unappealing. She had straight raven hair and her entire posture looked serene. Layla must have stared at her too openly for the woman smiled and asked, "Do you come here because you enjoy the scenery or is there more to it?"

She contemplated on whether she should tell the truth to a complete stranger or not. For once in her life, she found herself being judged through the eyes of a merely curious observer. The woman's eyes held no pity or hatred as far as she could tell. So she found herself telling "People don't like me. So I spend my time alone here in the company of animals, birds and trees".

The woman asked "And why don't people like you. Are you not nice to them?"
She almost laughed at that. Wasn't it obvious? Nice has nothing to do with why she was without a friend. She tried to be kind to her classmates. She smiled at them and earned looks of disgust in return. She tried to win Baba's affections time and again. She brought him tea and cooked his favourite food. But he barely acknowledged her efforts.

Out loud she said " People don't like me because the sight of me terrify them".
It was difficult to admit that in front of someone. But truth was truth after all.
The woman regarded her silently for a few moments before she spoke again, "If you are kind to them and they failed to reciprocate then it's entirely their fault. You should not let that bother you enough to run into hiding".
Layla didn't want to sound rude but she found herself saying,
"What do you know about me? It's easy to comment when you are not the one suffering".
"But if people really tried to understand you by only your outward appearances then they are missing out on a lot of things. A person is much more than his/her face".
Layla's anger flared at the words of the woman.
"Look at my face and tell me that you do not find me ugly like the others". She forced a lump at the back of her throat as she said this.

Again the woman waited for a few minutes before saying, "I wonder who invented these terminologies. Beauty and ugliness are merely words that someone gave the meanings in the way that they are perceived by us. I would be a hypocrite if I say I dont feel awed by beautiful things. But I find the sun beautiful because it emits warmth even on a cold winter day. The flowers are beautiful for their fragrance not merely because of their attractive shades and colours. The animals are beautiful because their eyes hold a certain innocence. You are beautiful because you have a beautiful heart". To this, Layla replied,
"I would rather be beautiful from outside and vain inside. Atleast that way, people will come near me rather than avoiding me".
" People avoid you because they want to test your courage. When people see someone who are stronger than themselves, they try to bring him/her down. Weak try to break the strong because they can't be strong themselves".
"I would still wish to be beautiful. "
The woman looked at her directly for a long moment before nodding. She asked "Is that what you really want?"
"Yes."
"What if you become beautiful on the outside but vain on the inside?"
"I tried to be good to people but they still see me as a hideous scarred girl. So I don't think being vain and pretty is that bad".
The woman smiled in a way that made Layla shiver. Then she said "Alright. When you wake up tomorrow, you will wake up as a very beautiful girl. Everyone will appreciate your beauty. Everyone will adore you. But every wish requires a compromise".
Layla could hardly control her breathing. She found the entire thing absurd and faulty and yet, yet the possibility that she could be beautiful by some miracle made her giddy with excitement. She looked at the woman closely to see if she was joking. The woman was a mystery in every sense. She looked....unreal. But she didn't appear to be bluffing. Against her better judgement, Layla asked carefully, "What compromise?"
The woman replied, "If you become beautiful again, everyone will appreciate you but you won't be able to appreciate anything. Neither the sunset nor the birds. Like you wished, you will be beautiful but vain".
Layla considered this. She was tired of being lonely and looked at like she was a nightmare come true. She knew the consequences but if she could have the affections of people, why would she ever need to come and watch the sunset again? She would be happy. She would have Baba's affections. Her aunts would love her without pitying her. Her classmates will befriend her.
She took a long breath and turned towards the woman, "I agree".
The woman did not ask her again. She took out a few leaves from her gown and told her "Crush these leaves and mix them with your milk. Drink it before you go to bed."
Hesitantly, Layla took the leaves and put them in her skirt pocket. As she looked up, she found that the woman was no longer there. She had simply vanished into thin air.

Layla hurried back home and did what she was asked. She drank the leaves with the milk and went to bed. She did not fall asleep immediately for she was too excited and nervous. She chastised herself for being too hopeful but found herself hoping nonetheless.


The next morning when Layla opened her eyes, the world appeared different somehow. She felt a dull ache in her head. She suddenly remembered the weird happenings of the day before and sprang out of her bed towards the mirror. She gazed at her reflection. Her scar was gone. Her face evidently looked clear and beautiful. But she didn't feel any different or look any different to herself. She tried hard to feel happy at the fact that her dream had come true but she couldn't. She got ready and went downstairs. She stopped short when she saw her Baba smiling up at her. She didn't remember when he had last smiled at her. He urged her downstairs and gave her a hug. But Layla didn't feel the warmth of the hug. Her Baba said, "My beautiful Layla, your mother would have been so proud to watch you grow into such a wonderful person". So many times, wondered Layla. So many times she had longed to hear these exact same words from her father. But when she finally heard them spoken, she didn't appreciate the words. She simply nodded and rushed out to go to school. She found herself being observed by many people as she passed by. They smiled approvingly. But she didn't smile back. She knew she was pretty now. But she felt....disgusted at the people around her. At school, her classmates approached her for games and gossips but she found herself growing frustrated. To her, the people around her were like mosquitoes, buzzing around her and making her wanting to kill them.

She ran to her usual spot as soon as the school got over. She sat by the pond and dipped her feet in the water. Her frustration did not ease. She could no longer appreciate the sunset, the changing colours of the sky, the fragrance of the flowers and worst of all she could not imagine. She felt a cold dread all over her. She had made a horrible mistake, one which can never be rectified. She bargained her soul for a beautiful face. She started crying. She called out for the woman but she knew that there was nothing more to be done. She stuck a bargain and it was a bad one. She eventually grew tired of crying and before she knew she fell asleep.

Layla woke up with a start and her hand immediately flew to her face. She looked her face in the reflection of the pond and to her surprising relief found that she was still hideous and ugly. She fell asleep while imagining which happened often. Yet this time there was something about the dream that was clearly meant to be a message. Layla understood that. She was stupid for wanting to throw away her soul at the expense of a kind of beauty that would wrinkle and decay with time. But beauty isn't just one thing. Beauty lies everywhere. You just have to open your eyes to it.
Layla promised herself that she would never hope to have a beautiful face again. Instead she decided that she would beautify her soul and strengthen it. She would spread joy and happiness while wearing a hideous face. She would be kind even when scorned down.
She would be beautiful to herself. The other people, can decide for themselves.

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