All I ask is for death to offer me a hand for I fear my end will be lonely. I fear that my memory will live on like a souvenir hanging on the rack at some out-of-busniess circus gift shop collecting dust, never to be picked up again.
I don't know why we fear death, always have I seen death as a companion through to the other side.
So you don't have to go alone.
Maybe death will take our hand and at that moment all of our fears, pains, worries, and barriers melt away.
Maybe you gaze upon death's face in sheer amazement for the immense nothingness engulfing the senses.
Maybe nothing happens and there is no meaning to all of this. But I refuse to believe that, I reject the notion that this means nothing, not a single damn thing, yeah fucking right! Like we are all here on a fucking magical floating rock spinning in a vast universe of unanswerable questions that lead to a barrage of more questions and basically having free will, thoughts, fears, ideas, hunger, pain and all of us just fucking like wild rabbits for no reason?!
I know my expectations are showing.
I also know that if this uncomfortable moment eases my anxiety even in the slightest then maybe that's exactly what I should be doing.
Feeling.
Feeling is the souls way of speaking. The soul remembers all it has endured to be here, where we are today, and it's merely cutting into the parts of ourselves that we have to face. That is how we let the light in, and not some theoretical light, but the lightness in clarity, the light felt in your mind when you unknowingly changed the trajectory of your life's direction. A souls guide gently reminding us of all that surrounds us and if we purge ourselves of the pressure to hold on to feelings or run from them, then the result is universal.
It's felt on a scale of which the sheer magnitude either breaks the chains voluntarily placed and vigorously shift back to nature. Or we remain, the same as we always have. And maybe that is what this sadness is that is felt globally, humanity griefing at the regrets of a fading life so filled with maybe's, should've's, could've's, would've's that we are hurling out into dangerous territory, ultimately setting ourselves up for failure.
 
Or maybe we're waking up and realizing how intimate the power we hold is and a real change is coming.
Maybe it starts with ourselves, we welcome the change that'll inevitably come, then we learn from change
And then...
Our whole world changes.
We can begin to venture out into life and start to really live.
And I don't see what's so bad about that.

© Ava Morris