I had dreams, I must've.
I can't recall but they had to exist.
Is that not what a person strives for?
Life couldn't have twisted any worse.

When I am living the nightmares.
I aim for survival. I dream of impossible situations. Of days that have the ability to make sense.

I do not know their names. The faces dancing around me. I only know the ghosts underground.

How do you expect me to act?
When I am left to navigate the darkness in my mind. How could you support my heart when I cannot remember yours.

I can dream dreams but ultimately I live the nightmares. A waking reality. How could I possibly explain to you the dire crisis inside my hippocampus? When I have no idea who you were to me.

I pulled the wool over your eyes.
Told you I could recall it all again.
But the honest truth is I know nothing but the building underground.

I hang onto to the only names I know, the hands that pulled me away from whatever life I had before. Can you understand how I wandered away?

I can't recall the city, I can't recall the school. I can't recall my family.
I can't recall you.

I remember the screams.
The pain.
The thousands of nights spent in panic.
The tears and the loss of emotion.
I remember the fallen.
The deaths.
All burned on the inside of my eyelids.

I cannot recall us.
Just smoke, blood and ash.
Forgive me if I took everything from you.
I lost an entire life.
The name you still call me.
I have no idea who she was.






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