... This is me, this is my life. I am so special
"So mama. We may take our leave now right?". Mama was so shocked by my reply. Is it me or I shouldn't have said that. "What is it mama dear?". I asked smiling "Well... I... thought since we haven't hanged out together for a while we could spend some time together... Or is that little girl has gat some plans?". I shook my head in laughter, this is my mama. She turns every day into an unforgettable moment. "Mother, I dont have any plans but I could make plans right away".
"Caroline, as your mother, I can tell you this. You are getting to a stage when you will solve more than thirty problems without me knowing anything about it". I inhaled and said "I know mum. I will beg a husband and we will stay united". She looked at me and smiled. I looked around before she said " Yes, my dear. Mama's not going to be with you forever". You will have to make a move". I nodded and said "Yes, I know mama dear. But before you leave me, you will have to enjoy life first!". She laughed and said" You will take a move. You will rise you will make a small mistake and you will fall".
She looked and me and continued "But you won't fail dear.. You are not going to fail, you are going to learn. You won't fail because... because.. I won't leave you with nothing...."
I was already thinking. Could she be talking about leaving me with money and those stuff? She held my hands and continued" The way I am holding you with affection. My dear, I will leave you with words, with little knowledge. I will teach you so, you will know what to do ". I looked into her eyeballs directly and said" Thanks mama, for you will be with me too". She removed her tissue quickly from the little purse she brought with her and cleaned the tears that had fallen from her eyes, 'wow!, I never knew that little word I said can get her to be this emotional' I smirked to myself "You never can tell what tomorrow will hold". She paused and drank the water. When I thought she was about to continue, she drank more water. "I guess it's time to go mum". Not that I was eager to dismiss our 'chitchat' but I knew it's high time we stopped besides there are other things I could do now right?. We stood up and began strolling to my room, which was quite a long walk since I was getting tired. I began to think of when my mama dear told me that 'We never can tell what tomorrow holds'. I know she might be perishing me for her death. I don't know but I don't feel bad as other daughters would. Not because I want to get rid of her. I know it can't be that because we are pretty close. Very close let me put it like that. Growing up hasn't been easy for me neither was it easy for my mum. Every girl always dreams about living a princess life but I had just wished my prince charming could shower me with love so that I can share that love with my mum. I haven't always been the smiley for with her, I smile sometimes but she feels ask the problems a mother is supposed to protect her child from age telling on me. Our life as always been the one that without my blood she can't live. She refuses to tell me the name of the sickness because we all know she can die anytime, anyday. And I don't want to find out because I would keep putting it in my mind and she wouldn't like it. She has talked about not being scared at all because she wants and needs to rest. "Mama, are you still scared... You know.. If dying?" I said breaking the silence.
"No am not dear". She held my hand as we approached the door of my room.
"Am not scared but I want you to be happy... For me". I nodded and was about to go in. Damn! I am so tired. How come am this tired? She grabed my hand and whispered "And remember, you are my love, my crown, my all. My lightly princess" I hugged her and for some minutes I was still in it because I never felt like leaving her warm yet cold arms.
"I love you Caroline Juggs" She shouted. My mum and her little drama, I rolled my eyes. I went to seat on my bed.
Indeed it has been a long day, I thought in my head.
*Light out*
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