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Who I Am...
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'My dear child,
I know you had your doubts about your birth. I couldn't tell you while I was alive so I left you this letter. Your real parents live in...'
I stared at the unfinished letter in shock. How was I supposed to find my true identity? How could the woman I called mom leave me with nothing but questions?!
Scanning again searching for some clue,some detail about who I am. Just confirmation that my life has been a lie for 21 years!
Before her death(my now newly foundout adoptive mother)she got sick, the doctors said it's cancer. Spreading fast and affecting her organs.
In the last days she would master strenght when I sat with her and talk. She would tell me about my childhood from my 2nd birthday,never before.


I have always been too young or naive to question her answers or flat replies when I asked her about myself as a baby. She would only light up when she talked about my second birthday onwards. The last few days she said things like, I wish I held you as a baby, I wish I could have woken up to your cry of hunger. At first I wrote it of as hysteria from pain, but as the time of her final hour crept closer, I listened and started fitting the pieces of the puzzle,now I sit with this letter, I was adopted at 2 years old.

Then I see it, bottom of the letter was a adress, a small town two hours drive from me. Could it be?! I grabbed my keys and off I went to seek answers. I drove up to the adress and inhaled deeply, now or never. I walked up to the front door and knocked.The door opens,blue eyes as my own was staring at me.
The woman gasped, I was a mirror of her just younger.
Tears filled her eyes, she smiled and said:" You finally came".

After hours of talking I found out that my father passed away, and they gave me up because they were minors and scared with nothing. We talked and she explained how they suffered for 2 years before they finally gave me up. We cried and laughed and I knew, I lost a mother but gained another.
© Lolla Smith