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Dear Diary,
Here we are again. As life is getting busier day by day. I don't get to spend time with you much. But today I really need you, because writing really clams me down and it helps me understand myself Better.
Do you know the feeling when your mind is clear but you're still confuse? When you know what you need but its not what you want.
I don't know its only a phase or its really over but I do know is I feel empty and full at the same time.
I'm struggling with my mood and pretending it doesn't effect me . In reality my mind has not stopped thinking about him for even a second.
but I don't know how to reach out and hold his hand when all i can see is dark.
I hope for better and what is best for me not (us) because, I'm so tired of driving this relationship now I just want to feel relaxed and home..
My Time is not just for to be wasted upon waiting. I want to be appreciated and loved the way I do but I think the picture he painted is long gone. And now its all blank..
My nights can be hard but i do want to see a new day and fresh beginning. Still how can i let go the ropes, holding me together?
Am I really worthless ? Or can I make a home for me where I'm valued, cared and my time is respected.
Floating thoughts and all this writing must be tiring for you.
I will not burden you much see you again soon. Next time with a happy entry ,I Hope.
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Yours Hadiya
© Hadiya_Shaikh