You don't need enemies, when your family members and friends are playing their part so wonderfully. Holding your hand,
how to discourage?
how to demotivate?
I learned from them...
what I should never do, they teached me... not by saying but by doing that...
First then broke my heart and of course me..
not only physically but also emotionally...
Sometimes I used to hate them...
No!!! Not Hate...
HATE is the word which I have never used for anybody...
EVER IN MY LIFE...
It sounds like I m depressed..

But, honestly speaking... YES I was depressed since 3 months...
Wanted to run away from my house...
wanted to end my life...
Every second I was cursing myself...
My mind was filled with negativity...
I was experiencing the shower of million unanswerable questions..
For many silly different reasons or issues...
Every moment or situation...
feels me like....
do I deserve this kind of treatment from them...???

The solution I was taking as a pain killer..
was crying alone...
hitting my head on the wall...
punching on the wall....
or In the way I say..
I was hurting myself..
sometimes I felt like....
DONE WITH THIS WORLD!!!!!

But then there's something or quality in me, called "SELFISHNESS".
because of which I m still surviving...
for MYSELF.
why should I die for somebody else..
if my presence is hurting them..
then I have something to offer them...
so-called, "POISON".

Which I had once for myself...
can I here be very honest...
may you all.. the one who is reading this... have noticed..
in this month.. I had deactivated my account almost 10 times... reason I said....
STUDIES...
but that was just a reason to tell... actual reason was something else..
which I don't wanna discuss...
even I don't wanna share with anybody...
coz I m trying to forget..

In that situation what I felt correct for myself I did...
deleted all the posts of mine of...