I know this hurts. I know your heart feels both numb and missing and free at the same time, and you are confused as to how that is possible. So while I collect the tiny pieces of that heart, ( it will take years ) let me tell you this special story in my mind. It was always there, in your eyes. My favorite story, and adventure. It was more than how they sparkled, or even reflected myself in them so comfortably. It was how you averted them to the ground, almost as if to say "don't look too long. It's bad for you." Each time you looked a little longer, each time you held your head in confidence, I couldn't help but crash into you. I remember the small things so clearly. The tiny touches and shy exchanges. It was like finding my way back home. You know, that excited feeling after being away to come back to your bed, to be in your own space, where it's ok to be exactly who you are and safe. You felt just like that. So it was, that all of me was to be obliterated. I was to be torn open and exsposed to a reality that is only read in news papers and you shudder and think "how awful, I can't imagine that."
I became that story. It gnawed at you. It tugged every single fiber of your soul, because I would never say "I need help, I'm so scared" out loud. But you saw it in my eyes. Reached for me with your hands and did not want to let me go.

I was marinating in feelings that I could not believe. I was being chipped away to nothing and couldn't stop it. You threw yourself into that darkness and ran with me. We ran and ran and ran. You wanted me to be back in the light. So, I remember every single word. Every single...