I wished to see Swatha... before leaving the city... I know she will wait for my call and wish to meet.

What can be done in front of our destiny?

It is, DadoSa who had this wish to see me as soon as my exams get over...He arranged tickets for my flight ... on top of that he arranged for guards to receive me from the City airport...no chance he left to meet my Swath...! Uff... Swath...

In the palace, I'm caged. Surveillance of eyes...
There Swath...Oh ...God knows, what all her mini mind must be hissing her and stressing her...

I kept my mobile on silent. All the time someone or the other is behind or beside me. I am in a royal cage.
I know Swath will msg.

"BuwarSa, Maharani asked you to come down for Pandaal puja, for the engagement function of KuwarSa".GitoKaka said.

"Kaka, Tell Masa I'm not well. Will join the main engagement ceremony " I told Gito Kaka.
He always cared for me as his son and protects small lies from his Maharani and Raja... since my childhood.
I never felt Gito Kaka, is one of our servants or hired as my caretaker. He is closer than my uncle or Dad. He knew me better than them.
"Maharani wants to introduce yourself with a special guest, "Gito Kaka said.
"This is the reason... Kaka...anyways, I'm coming ". I shook my head for no excuse or escape from the guest!

The whole pandal was arranged with colorful flowers, puja thali, puja kalash, Kumkum, haldi, and lamps. Everything...just reminds me only about Swath... Oh God, I haven't said a single word to her since I reached here... I took my mobile to type...then I heard,
" Sagen Bhai ...plz, stop gluing into the mobile... Otherwise, MaSa will ask you another 100 questions. " Suchitra said almost teasing me to tuck my mobile inside my pocket.

Only Suchi and I share the bonding of frankness beyond rules and restrictions. She is younger to me...younger than Swath...
I now imagine if these two women will meet... Oh God... My brain will stop working as they both can't shut their mouth!!

"Suchi... I can't breathe here. Who are they... I'm bored of smiling."
"Mingle around them or...see the girls...Hahaha... if you need help to get introduced to any girl..., don't feel shy...I'm always at your service my BhuwarSa(younger brother). "She giggled and picked a red rose from the basket kept in the Pandal area.
"Shut up Suchi... I want to sleep... Since last week I was preparing for the exam...and now I'm here! Uff..."
"Yes yes... Studious Bhai... Stop explaining your discomfort being here ...from sleep excuse...Come we will go to the open terrace and spend time talking...Also, I will have Bhundi Prasad..shhh...secret Bro... as MaSa said not to eat anything before this ceremony gets over" She moved towards a thali kept in with Prasad's packet.
"Why do girls want to talk so much Suchi... " I missed Swath in my mind...and I said giggling.
"Ahwh... How many girls do you talk around...dear BuwarSa...haha...... "
She teased me as she stepped stairs towards the open terrace on top holding her Pinkish silver glittered Gagrah...

As I reached on top... I felt a bit of relief ...ahh...I saw the blue sky... This blue sky.... I closed my eyes...and can see Swath waving her hair...

"BhaiSa,... Do you have any idea how long this Purohit ji is going to take time for pandal puja... I want to eat... I so hurry yar... "
"Go and eat then..."I carelessly said as I leaned my back on the walls attached to the sculpture of an elephant.

The pink and the peacock color of Kanath reminds me of Swath... Uff... Swath... I wish to see you now...

"Sagen Bhai... I'm hungry yar.... This bhundi is filled with jaggery..."
I giggled..." It's a sweet dish, Suchi..."
"Yeah...but...how much one can eat sweet at a time my stomach aches with hunger."
She filled her mouth with the last pinch of Prasad.

Suchi... I need to call... Just 5 mint...Ok...
As I was to press the button for Swath's call... I heard...
" Buwar Sa... Maharani is calling you..." A maid said.
"Oh God..."
"BhaiSa bhago bhago.... I heard Suchi laughing at me..."
"Yeah."
I rushed down the stairs.
"MaSa. " I uttered in a low voice as my hands crossed down and stood bowing my head.
" This is Sagen...My younger son. He came yesterday... He had his final exams of..... "
Masa introduced me to some guests.
" Hello," I said with a smile.
" She is Deputy Chief's wife., She ranked in our State Women Association...She is the wife of General Sahab... She is from...She is this....blahh blah... And blah... MaSa introduced all reputed ladies with their so-called ranks.... & gathered from all states!
My mind had only one woman... my Queen Ms. Swathantra Menon....

After 5mint...I signed Gitto Kaka to take me away from here.
As I tried, MaSa saw me, she looked into my eyes, not as a mother.... I felt the heat under my face.

"Rani Sa, the ceremony is going to start. Purohit ji asked all to gather around for havan. " one maid said.
"Sure."Maharani stood up and all the other ladies followed her.

The Havan was taking place in a small area of the garden. The family members of Goom are on the left side and opposite side bride's family. All the guests were sitting under the Shade. Served with juices, water, and starters.
"Havan is going on for one hour". Suchi whispered to me.
I sat next to Suchi...as I can't handle my stress without her.
"BhaiSa... I can't focus on anything except food... Why this pundit ji is taking so much time...
Just exchange rings and game over ufff.... Bhai... Do something yar.." I know Suchi, can't stop her cravings.
"Wait let me check... "I signed Gitto Kaka who was standing behind me,"Kaka, try something ...She is hungry".
"But, BhuwarSa, it's a rule that food can be taken only after the ceremony."
I looked towards the haven kund. I felt to run away...
"Suchi ...keep patience," I uttered as no other word I found to say.
It took 2 hours to finish Havan.
We all got up.
"BhaiSa run"... Suchi held my hand to take me away from the crowd.
Sagen... I heard MaSa.
I turned and looked at her, releasing my arm from Suchi's hand.
"Go and distribute all these... to the people gathered outside of the MahaKaal temple. Take Gitto Kaka with you and a guard."
MaSa can I also... Suchi uttered her wish to say..... but she read MaSa's eyes that she cannot go with me. Princess Suchitra Devi has rules to follow even to go out with her brother!

I felt... pathetic head pain as I saw a crowd behind my car in front of the temple.
I have to visit the temple for a distribution thing ...
the heat of noon, and the crowd... and smiles on my face for no reason... I'm tired... I'm sick... I want to run away... I'm thirsty but cannot drink until I reach the palace and get in my glass tested by someone called a guard!

The common people outside the temple looked at me as Imnot a human being...they try to touch my feet as if I were God...
I see so many faces closely while distributing food, clothes, and packets of money as I'm the God who came down in this desert... uff.... my Freedom.... My Swath...my life...

"BhaiSa...I had lunch just now... You also go and have soon...
Meet my friend...Divya... From Delhi" Suchi held my hand and stopped me as I was rushing to get inside my room...for urgent relief from the crowd and air to relax my mind.
Hi... I said to Divya.
Bhaisa...Divya is my only friend with whom I am allowed to mingle around in school. Suchi said, adjusting her glasses and looking at Divya.
I looked at Divya and smiled. I know what my sister wishes to convey. Her emotion for Divya. Being allowed to make friends and mingle around freely... Freedom....hits us with a stone inside this Royal bloodline.

BhuwarSa...how were your exams? Divya asked me.
oh...it was ok... I said.
"Suchi... I need to rest a while... I m going inside my room". I said and turned my back to step up the stairs leading to my room.
"Bhuwar Sa...no ...no... you can't go like that easily...."Choti Kaki... said, as she caught me!
"Oh, Kaki..." I was exhausted to find words to escape from here...
"I need a small nap... plz," I said making a kid-like face.
"if you say this ... then who will care about the packing of these gifts, to send with our guest...your elder brother is getting engaged in a few days marriage function will start ...so much work to do...don't you have any responsibilities... already you just dropped on the right day ...." Choti Kaki said as she kept some thali on the table beside the end of the staircase.
I felt my brain will bomb blast if I go for an argument. I tried to erase my anxiety and said,"Okay...Kaki... tell me what I m supposed to do".
"Good... go, and check all packages are properly kept by servants or not...after that ...go to your Kaku Sa, Rana Sa and sit with them...stop being all the time with your sister... you both are grown up now."
I ran away as she finished. I saw Suchi looked puzzled and was helping Kaki and the other ladies.

I sat next to Kaku Sa. He is a bit joyous. Rather than DadooSa and my father...MaharanaVijayRajput.
My Dad rarely had time to ask about me... I don't remember when we sat and laughed, I feel jealous of Swath...she is lucky her father ask and take care of her as if she is still a baby.
I was kept introduced to people in whom I have no interest...
politicians, businessmen, the bride's family members... God knows who all....

I had lunch with all the male members of the family. Ladies served their husbands standing behind them.
My heart could only miss my Swath... How she will look in these long dupattas over her face or on her head.... Smile waved on my lips.
And my eyes saw my uncle smiling back!

how the day came to an end, I had no idea...I sleep as I was in bed...exhausted...I got up at 3 am, I went to my window which had a wider view towards the garden... The wind is fresh and cold... I can see the clear sky and stars... I thought at first to ping Swath... but what to tell her, why to disturb her from sleep... I'm so tired to hold mobile... and talking...
I looked down in the garden... I saw Suchi...
"Suchi...what are you doing?"
"just walking...peacefully Bhai, will sleep after some time," She said stretching her arms up in her night pant and top.
I looked at her. She is walking slowly, calmly, erasing her mind being a Princess...
around the small garden in front of her room...
my sister too needs Freedom! I sighed...and I'm the Sagen Rajput... caged under the invisible crown called Royalty!
© Saranya Anish Nair