My mind started racing and the world around me started getting blurry and faded. My ex is at conversion camp, in the same cabin as me. I mean small world but this is another level. I slowly started walking toward my group, bag in hand. Elliot looked at me, then turned his attention to the ground. "Alright boys, let's go on up to our cabin and get settled in!" Our overly enthusiastic counsler announced. It was a short hike up a hill to reach our cabin. It was small and surrounded by trees. We somberly walkied into the building and looked around. It was dusty, musty and all around crusty. There were two bunk beds on either side, and a bathroom. "These are the pamphlets I forgot to hand out earlier." The counsler gave each of us a slip of paper saying when our meals were and what time we had 'church'. We all got our things set up and I sat on one of the bottom bunks. Elliot was above me. I can't tell if he hates me or is as terrified as I am. Whatever he was feeling, he didn't speak the entire time. Before we knew it dinner time had approched us. The food was...something. The fuckin buiscuts were stale. Who lets the buiscuts go stale?? Not to meantion the meatloaf looked like prison food. I could tell Elliot and the others were 'astonished' by our meal. We huffed it down to the best of our ability, and went back to our hell of a cabin. "What do you guys think church is gonna be like?" Holland said. "Probably homophobic screaming backed up by 'Jesus take the wheel'." I suggested. They let out a small giggle, even Elliot smiled. I've missed that smile. After a while of talking our counselor came and told us it was time for 'church'. Another small hike to what seemed like and old gym building. The other kids were inside. We sat down and hoped not to be thrown into the nearby river for our 'sins'. A man in a preist outfit walked in and began talking. It was just about how being gay is wrong and how we gotta purge our demons from inside of us or whatever the fuck. We were slapped if we said anything against their beliefs. At the end of the whole thing I was about to cry. All of us were. The majority of the kids had red hand marks on their faces. We hiked back to our shelter in scilence. It was 9:00 at night now. "Can I trust you boys not to do anything against what we learned tonight?" The counsler asked. We slowly nodded and he left the cabin. A few moments of scilence pass by when suddenly Elliot gets up and locks the cabin door. "What are you doing?" Holland asked surprised from Elliot's behaviour. He didn't say anything, but walked over to me and hugged me. He held me tightly. I could feel his body shaking as he started to cry. I put my arms around him and let the tears fall aswell. Then Holland started crying, and our other roomie, who we call Bex, did too. The whole room was just a bunch of gay guys crying. Bex decided we should go to bed and we did. I looked at my watch, 11:46. The others were asleep. I lay there, wondering when, and how we leave this place. I heard creaking coming from the bunk above me. I closed my eyes and pretended to be asleep. I felt the sheets move and arms wrap around me. I peaked to see Elliot, laying beside me. His hands were cold as he slid them up my shirt. I felt my cheeks get red when he nuzzled up to the nape of my neck and whispered,

"Don't leave me alone."


© smolman