Hi. My name is Rose. Yeah a bit cheesy like the flower. I live in the small town of ChutterButter somewhere in the South..... Or maybe North.... Doesn't matter I don't think. My Geography teacher would probably be disappointed. As he always is. But you are not. Let me guess you are bored. Don't give me that shocked look. I know I'm good at mind reading... I guess it is one of my many talents. But let me tell you a trick I used to guess that you are bored. Wait a moment. This is a secret, make sure no one can see it. This is between you and me, a master does not often reveal his secrets to his art. The reason I know you are bored is because.... Are you sure you closed that window. I'm being serious here. Anyway: Because the only person who would read one of my stories is someone who is bored. You have to be very, very, very bored to read this. Very..... That was a lot of verys in one sentence but you get my point.

So today I'm gonna tell you one particular comedy that happened in my home a few years ago but first I shall introduce the characters that shall entertain you for this short story. Unfortunately though these characters are my family..... To be completely honest with you.. Well.. I guess you can say that not everyone is born for well civilisation. In my case I try to keep my family from shocking normal human beings. Firstly there is father, Mr Butlock. Yes Butlock. I Know. I get teased all the time you know. He is well... One could say a bit of a stout man.... Well fed. Good appetite. Very good appetite. An appetite that causes a strain on his front shirt buttons. Then there is Peter, my 17 year old brother. I believe that of all my family, he is the least crazy...Outwardly. I'm not even gonna start about what goes on in that head of his....