Today was the day, it was the day that I was going on my first official date ever, everything had to be perfect. I was so excited and I woke up at 8am. I got a message from him and I felt as though my heart stopped because it was pounding so hard. The message said

"Hey, I just can't wait to see you you make everything better for me!" Lee texted. I was so happy. He picked me up in his vehicle and we headed towards the Art Museum, the art museum was full of art of all kinds from paintings to sculptures. The place was amazing and we had such an amazing time. I got to know him for him and he acted different around me than with his friends. I liked the way he acted around me. We went to eat at a local restaurant.

"Hey you do know you're my favorite person in the world?" he said as he shoved some pasta in his mouth

"Hold on let me get that on recording" I encouraged.

I took out my phone and saw that my instagram was blowing up, it turns out that Lee was tagging me in a photo with him while going on our date. I smiled and looked at him and said "Lee, you're so silly, why did you tag me in an instagram photo"

"Because you're so cute!"

" are you kidding me I look bad, and now all the guys are following me"

"Tell them no, you're all mine"

"Oh?"

I gave him a kiss on the cheek and he turned rose red.

He turned to give me a kiss on the lips but then our waiter came.

"So can I get you guys any dessert?" the waiter questioned

"No thank you we'll go eat ice cream at my house." he replied

The waiter was flirting with him, but he wasn't reciprocating.

"I have to go powder my nose" I lied. I actually had to go take my antihistamines.

I go into the bathroom with the intent to look beautiful when I came back, but things got worse.

I hear these girls laughing behind me as I walk in, it turns out that I got my period while I was in my nice white skirt. My hygiene products were in my purse so I tried to see if I could sneak to the table but Lee wasn't there so I wasn't worried until he came up behind me, instead of laughing at me for it, he was so sweet and put his sweater around my waist. He didn't mention it after that, but insisted on letting me go home instead to his house. I didn't want to ruin the date and persisted on going. We were getting into his car as it was dusk and humid outside like a really hot type of humid. Lee was in his car and told me that it was going to rain, I was scared. What if he finds out that I have aquagenic urticaria? Will he be mad that I didn't tell him or would he respect my privacy and understand why I didn't. Just as I'm gazing out the window of his Ford Focus another ford focus pulls up, it's Aaron and he's with a girl that I know the girl, but I can't remember how.

"Want to race?" asks Aaron

"I'll beat you" replies Lee.

I roll my eyes "boys will be boys, I guess"

"It's fraidy wady"

"Ohhhhh. It's Neisha" I think to myself

Aaron tells Neisha to knock it off, but she won't, so he just gives in.

The light turns green and the race is on. Lee is laughing as he is being beaten by Aaron.

He turns to me and says "I let my B win"

I laugh "that's sweet."

I mutter hoping he won't hear me "maybe I'll be your B too"

He smiled, but didn't say anything. I got home and he opened the door for me

"Goodnight!"

He leaned in for a kiss but then the thunder went off and I had to get inside before it started raining.

"Just in the nick of time!!!" my mom yelled at me. "Don't you understand the rain is dangerous right as you stepped inside the rain started roaring. I can't lose you you're all I have!!! If I lost you I'd lose myself." my mom started crying.

My mom hadn't told me that Kylina passed away, the one person who I talked to about my depression was gone. My grandma the one I was named after, I couldn't tell her that I loved her. her funeral was in a couple weeks, we picked out the casket, and went to the funeral, Lee was there but I didn't talk to him, Tears rolled down my cheeks as I walked up to the open casket and said goodbye. I started crying to the point where my nose was running. I heard somebody get out of their seat I was hoping it was Lee to make sure that I was okay. He grabbed me, and I wrapped my arms around his waist as he hugged me like there was no tomorrow

"It's okay Kylie, she's in a better place now, god needed her as an angel"

He grabbed my hand and kissed it. I momentarily stopped crying as I felt the beating of his heart and calmed down. After the burial I got home and I could feel the mood was more depressing and sad rather than joyful and happy. I heard a buzz in my pocket

"Kylie r u doing ok?"

"No not really could really use a cuddle buddy."

"I just finished working out so I can take a shower before coming over."

"No, don't take a shower I'll see you tomorrow, I'll be in class...hopefully"

"Kylie I know this isn't the best time to ask you but will you be my gf, it's just I really care about you and I want to change my facebook status. :)"

"It's just not a good time rn Lee. I'm sorry"

"Okay, I'll pick you up for school!?"

"Sure :)"

The next day came by and it was just cold and rainy out which is surprising in Nevada it's always hot and humid which is why I live here, does god not want me to be happy this is so stupid. While banging my head against the wall I figured I'd grab my phone and text him.

"Lee I can't go to school"

"Why not, is it me?"

"No"

"Why are you so secretive, you're not supposed to keep secrets from your boyfriend"

"Huh?"

"best friend. Oops autocorrect!, I just always felt like you trusted me and now you're keeping something from me, I feel it."

"I don't have to tell you everything you have no idea what it's like living with life the way I do, I have to watch myself everyday and every time I see somebody."

"What do you mean? I thought you never had a boyfriend, is it like something bad that happened to you, should I be worried?"

"You don't understand, no you are the first experience I've ever had but I don't think I'm ready to tell you"

"But you can trust me, you know about me, maybe not everything but if you just want to be friends, I'm okay with it, I'll respect it."

"So you're giving up"

"If you don't want to be with me it's okay"

"That's not it at all, I don't want you to be with one person for your entire life who has a disease, you need to experience something else before you're trapped with me"

"What do you mean disease?"

"There's a reason Leah calls me Fraidy Wady"

"Your Waders? I always thought you looked cute in them."

" I have aquagenic urticaria, I can never experience a normal human life, I'll never be able to touch water or even imagine going swimming, you'd be missing out on so much with me, so before you commit to me you need to experience all the things normal people do like skinny dipping, water slides, and everything like that."

I received no response I looked outside my window to try and get Lee's attention by throwing little pebbles at his window that were sitting on my window ledge. Lee wasn't answering. He was either playing minecraft or listening to music, or maybe he was avoiding me. I called his number and just got his voicemail, I must have called him 10 times before I finally gave up.

When I woke up in the morning I woke up with my mom standing over me.

"Get up, it's so beautiful outside and I want to go for a walk"

She started to see a therapist about my grandma and she told her exercise is very therapeutic.

"God leave me alone I'm trying to sleep"

"Maybe you shouldn't be spending so much time dating Lee"

"I'M NOT DATING HIM, HE'S JUST MY BESTFRIEND, ANYWAYS HE WON'T TALK TO ME SINCE I TOLD HIM I HAD AQUAGENIC URTICARIA!"

My mom answered the phone as she felt the buzzing in the pocket and went to the other room.

I tried ease-dropping, but my mom closed the door. She was almost whispering like there was something she had to keep from me or something I was worried.

"Okay, thanks for letting me know, I'll tell her to call you"

My mom opened the door abruptly

"Call Marissa, she needs to tell you something."

"Okay"

I ran to my room up the stairs and closed the door I called her.

"Marissa what's going on?"

"Kylie, hey how are you doing.?"

"I'm worried about Lee I mean he hasn't answered my texts at all, and I didn't see him at home this last weekend at all"

"Wait, u don't know yet?"

"What do you mean"

"His phone is broken, he dropped it while staying at his friend's, he's out getting a new one right now!"

I was thinking to myself maybe he didn't get my text maybe he passed out before he received it. That would be a relief to not have to worry whether he knows or not. I didn't mean to say it to him like that. I wanted to say it so he wouldn't freak out. Let's hope he didn't freak out.

I sit at the window all day waiting for his return, then it turns dusk, and I peered out the window as headlights flash in my window. It's Lee but he's got company, she's a blonde girl who looks good with heels long legs and tan with a belly piercing, exposed.

I throw a pillow across the room

"Why didn't I saw yes to being his girlfriend, why was I so stupid to have friendzoned him!!!" I friendzoned him because I loved him. Because I didn't want to lose him and now he's gone"


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