(So I'm gonna be posting the first second, and third chapter as separate stories on here of my sort of weird sci-fi fantasy hybrid chapter story of a trans space explorer enjoy. this is chapter 1)

Warren stared into the mirror with the same expression as always, then he snarled because if Selene were here , but Warren was not calling his big sis only to complain again. Plus, she was probably at work, and HE DID NOT want to bother her there, Selene was about as great an older sibling as he could have. Selene's work was important not just for her but for everyone affected by it, and he would do anything to avoid interrupting that kind of work. Warren then looked at his cellphone and saw his baby sister Luna's phone number. Warren thought about calling Luna, but then stopped himself. No, not, after the last time, he thought.
He was not about to force one of that variety of stereotypical religious lectures from their parents on her. Warren hated those speeches and did not want her to get that from them similarly. Not again, never ever again, he shouted to himself. Luna may have well been the one person who could make him smile. However, that concern did not matter as much as her mental health or safety in that house. Warren wanted to ensure no one else would ever experience that sort of hatred again. Especially after Warren finding out she was gay and knowing how headstrong she was.
He bit his lip, then looked in the mirror again. Warren tried to force a smile this time, but failing at that action, Warren sighed. It Seems like it's resting glum face again today, Warren thought as he shot a brief look at his chest before slipping his work shirt over his head. The situation had gotten easier not to think about: the discomfort Warren had felt before transitioning. Almost effortless to ignore,were the other pains he felt alongside it when his cousin Stevie had gone missing. Easier to overall see himself truly as himself though truly, without one of the two people who had helped him most.
This too shall pass, he smirked. Warren did not know why of all things that came to mind. Though it ultimately did not matter as he shoved at the thought out. Yeah, it would pass, but damn if it didn’t hurt before it did. Ever since Stevie had been missing, Warren had searched. Ever since Stevie was lost, Warren had searched. Warren had also fought through years of hardship to become the man he was now. Yeah, maybe this feeling will pass. After nearly doing tornado damage to his life, it would probably have to give.
He wanted to punch something, break something, or break down and cry despite how “unmanly” it was. But he did none of those things. Instead of searching, instead of putting his life off for someone long gone, Warren was going to go to work as calmly and soundly as he could. Besides, Stevie would have hated knowing that Warren wasted his life or his potential worrying about him. Especially given he was a believer too. Albeit not like the holier-than-thou people at the church. Yeah, definitely not like them, he said to himself as he finished getting ready.
As Warren bolted his front door, he kicked off his shoes. He was about ready to collapse into sleep on the couch by the time he got there. He grumbled and went to heat some pizza rolls in the microwave instead. How does Selene do it? Warren wondered as he sat in the kitchen chair. But, then again, he knew precisely how Selene did it. The same way Warren used to be able to do the work. He laughed to no one but himself. He wanted to shout, in anger, or scream but again held himself back from doing either.
Instead, he quietly moaned, ”Is this depression or just gifted kid burnout.”
Maybe it’s both. A ghostly, mysterious voice spoke up.
A ghost, no, don’t be silly, Warren. You sound like Stevie or Selene saying such things. He scanned his environment for intruders, but Warren found nothing. As Warren tried to pull himself together, his anxiety got the better of him. He quietly asked his security system to do a scan. It did locate only him. Stevie designed the security system anyhow, and he was a genius with tech before… Before, he had been lost to them all, potentially forever.
His cousin had been a brilliant tech guy. Warren’s sister was currently a brilliant scientist in alien biology. But they both believed in such unusual things for someone who you would have expected to be skeptics. Ghosts, spirits, demons, and monsters even were believable to his sister. As for Stevie, most of that had been acknowledged, except maybe, stereotypical monsters. Warren and Stevie both knew that there were monsters far more dangerous than those kinds. Warren, however, didn’t believe in the other things as that implied the existence of beings far greater or more horrible than them.
Why should Warren believe in those things anyways? He hadn’t had any reason to since age 16. First, it had been his father and stepmother kicking him out. Then, around age 19, just when he was finally starting to be in a good place again, his cousin and best friend in the entire world Stevie, went missing. Some people had their limits on belief and he reached his.
But he knew Selene was different. She was a bright hopeful optimist. He never wanted to discourage hope. He just didn't have any left in him was all. He hesitated again, then picked up his phone.
Selene looked out her kitchen window seemingly absent-mindedly. She and her partner were washing dishes, one of their doubles chores, in opposition to their switch chores. Rainey her partner looked over at her, curious.
`What is on your mind, sweetheart?` They inquired to Selene, who bit her lower lip.
`I guess I am worried about my younger siblings, including Warren, who never has it easy this time of year.`
`I can not say I blame him entirely.` She sighed, Selene, while she may not know what Warren was going through, she did understand grief to a degree if only her brother would talk to her Selene knew he had to come to things in his own time at his own pace, fingering the cross on her necklace with her thumb, yeah, in his own time, Selene thought as she smiled sadly, a ringtone sounded, Selene immediately answered.
Selene started talking, `Hey man, how you doing,`
Silence then…
`Good, just a little worn out,`
`Okay, do you want to give me an answer that is not total Bull Shit?`
Warren sighed… more silence... Finally
`Thinking about Stevie`
`He would not want you to worry about him, Warren,`
`Well, Stevie is probably not wanting anything now,` he said sarcastically.
`He can, but .`
She paused, bit her lip again, then continued on.
`Regardless of whether you believe that, how about me, you and Rainey get together?
`Why?`
`Because Stevie would want us to honor his time on earth and celebrate his life, as well as grieve his death.`
`Wait, are you suggesting we do it on that day?`
`Why not?`
`I guess you are right, and we do need to deal with this head-on,`
Selene smiled because maybe Warren finally understood.
`I know why you miss him, buckaroo, but you have to adjust eventually,`
`Maybe, but I will not ever forget him, be it 3 more or even 6 more years down the line`
`I would not dream of suggesting doing that` `This is just because we need to try to celebrate the time he was with me and you is all.`
Warren laughed a hardy laugh.
`Well, I am sure he would appreciate it,`
All of a sudden a cold came over Selene.
Selene shuddered for a second. Then the room went back to normal as if nothing had ever happened. She walked over to the thermostat and checked it.
No Noticeable change that’s odd she pondered. Rainey looked at her curiously as if to say “What’s going on”. Then Warren voiced that thought.
“Everything okay Selene?’ He asked worriedly.
“Yeah, just a little ghost chill is all” She hurriedly replied only half joking.
Selene could practically feel Warren's eyes roll from being on the phone with him.
“Yeah, okay, well, tell the ghost that I said hi, or whatever,” he said a joke in its entirety.
“Will do, buckaroo, bye” Selene smiled then again thought In his own time, he’ll come around.
“See you, my sister, who is my keeper” He joked, then hung up.
Rainey, who had been listening from a short distance finally spoke up “ Well he seems, as cheerful as ever”.

Warren reached into his pocket and put down his phone. Inside the pocket, he found a picture, the picture. The last photo the three of them had ever taken together. It was right before Stevie’s first day of college proper. Selene had taken them both out for dinner. Warren had been voraciously eating. Stevie had a big goofball grin on his face as if he was about to do something funny, and he probably was, knowing him. Selene, who was taking the photo, was close to crying from pride and happiness. Mostly for Stevie, but for Warren as well. It was an amazing night, but Warren and Stevie had almost been too busy to spend time with each other in the months that followed. This was despite the both of them going to the same school. So it was the last big night for the three of them to get together. As Warren stared down at the photo he slowly began to against his will sob.
As soon as he got himself put together again, he went to get his pizza rolls. He could only hope they weren’t cold at that point. He shuddered as a chill ran down his back, while he was walking to get his food. He smirked remembering what his sister said about ghost chills.
“Yeah right, we would have seen some by now.’ he spoke aloud.
Or maybe heard them. A wispy voice chimed in.
“Which is not what is happening right now” Warren started.
“What’s happening right now is either my overactive imagination mixed with tiredness is making me hallucinate” he continued less sure. “Or I’m dreaming or having a mental breakdown.” he was scrambling for a logical answer at that point.
“Yeah think logically Warren, thats impossible, a ghost, who would ever believe that”
Not everything we know can be defined by logic, or else we’d live in a perfect uncomplicated world full of robots. The voice sounded as if it was quoting someone now not only that but….
Stevie said that to me multiple times when we were in college. Warren went to grasp the photo again and felt a rush of cold.
“That’s even more impossible, this is just my grief manifesting in the only way it can:” he was probably grasping at straws but Warren didn’t care. There is no such thing as ghosts he repeated to himself. That’s all just kids' stuff.
He went to the bathroom to splash cold water on his face, so maybe he’d wake up from this nightmare.
Grief like pain has a funny way of revealing the truth. The voice had started taking a familiar tone, and range. Like his, Warren looked down at the sink and then over at the toilet. He felt like throwing up his lunch that he had 5 ½ hours prior. I probably just need sleep, abanonding his food ,Warren quickly readied himself for bed. Then as he checked the mirror one last time he saw something that chilled him completley as well as a part of his mirror.
Standing behind him was a paler, more see-through, and sadder-looking version of someone Warren knew all too well.
“There’s no way, I’ve completely lost my mind” he shuddered as an undeniably ghostly hand grasped his shoulder.
The voice was now completely normal, and completely his cousin Stevie's, he spoke.
“That is irony, huh, man”
“I lost my body, and you think you lost something”
Warren slowly turned around and looked at his cousin. His impossible ghostly cousin laughed, and then said,
“Yeah I know a lot to take in, especially for me”
Warren went to his room and sat down on the bed. Stevie walked into the room and looked at Warren with a sad smile on his face.
“It’s nice to see you too, I guess” Stevie joked playfully.
Warren looked up and said with a small smile
“ I guess you and Selene were both right.”