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Graduate Gratitude.
5.0 was the dedication...3.5 was the minimum...but 3.42 were my figures.
I almost lost what we call sanity the moment I saw it, but had to comport myself...
...not like I didn't see it coming, but "seeing is believing" really clicked at that point...
Was going so well till the final year & high came the work load, running along earnestly to catch up was me, but still, woosh went the CGP.
..."Pull yourself together" were my words ...such irony to what was going on inside of me.
You think sleeping with a broken heart is depressing, try sleeping with a restless mind, or worse- the both...
... waking up was where the problem laid.
"Why this after all my efforts? How would I explain my hard work to others? Would they believe that I tried my best? Questions that fancied my thoughts!
No motivational talk could bring me out of my wrath..
... tormenting me was the step I took.
It wasn't the fault of the decimals that got me low and unbalanced...
... but the sacrifices not in relation to the result.
If I knew I would fall to a 2.2, why didn't I go to parties, sleep more, eat heavy, skip classes, deprive the mosquitoes of my presence, block out a lot of insults & enjoy my comfort to the fullest...
... instead I did the complete opposite and Oh! did I do them well & more. Those were my recurring regrets.
I would lie if I say I didn't push blames. Yh I blamed the school system...and highly did I blame the lecturers...and part did I blame my parents, but still did my Spirit keep saying otherwise " I know you tried your best"...not like I didn't blame Him also.
Tho words of man wasn't doing justice, God was doing His thing and gradually I "Picked" myself up, consistently reminding me that the Spirit in me is not One to be timid or discouraged, but one of power, love and self discipline (2 Timothy 1:7).
I got to realise that no one's pressuring me, than me...
...My parents got the ache initially, but they got over it, but I was still beating myself up...
Why? I didn't realize till recently..
Cos I was thinking too much on what others would think or feel..
... driving too much energy away from thanksgiving & gratitude...
... channeling it to reading minds.
It's funny how it took actually going for my graduation to live by my very words..
"If the outcome is as a result of giving it your all, then mehn you did a good job; Close your minds to what others might say, or what the result says, You did well... Appreciate yourself."
Now... going back to my recurring regrets...if I didn't put in all those efforts, feeling bad can be justified..
...but, there are no regrets, for my HARD WORK, the HARD WORK of my family, friends & one-season helpers, and the GRACE of God all need to be acknowledged....4 Years of hard study is a big deal...flaunt it...
So I say a Big CONGRATULATIONS to me and a very PROUD one to everyone of my friends that graduated, either with a 1st Class, 2nd Class Upper (2.1), or like me a Second Class Lower (2.2), 3rd Class, even the ones that had the door opened through for them (Pass). You worked hard for it, be Proud!!! And work harder where you at, and harder where you are going.❤️❤️❤️
© All Rights Reserved
I almost lost what we call sanity the moment I saw it, but had to comport myself...
...not like I didn't see it coming, but "seeing is believing" really clicked at that point...
Was going so well till the final year & high came the work load, running along earnestly to catch up was me, but still, woosh went the CGP.
..."Pull yourself together" were my words ...such irony to what was going on inside of me.
You think sleeping with a broken heart is depressing, try sleeping with a restless mind, or worse- the both...
... waking up was where the problem laid.
"Why this after all my efforts? How would I explain my hard work to others? Would they believe that I tried my best? Questions that fancied my thoughts!
No motivational talk could bring me out of my wrath..
... tormenting me was the step I took.
It wasn't the fault of the decimals that got me low and unbalanced...
... but the sacrifices not in relation to the result.
If I knew I would fall to a 2.2, why didn't I go to parties, sleep more, eat heavy, skip classes, deprive the mosquitoes of my presence, block out a lot of insults & enjoy my comfort to the fullest...
... instead I did the complete opposite and Oh! did I do them well & more. Those were my recurring regrets.
I would lie if I say I didn't push blames. Yh I blamed the school system...and highly did I blame the lecturers...and part did I blame my parents, but still did my Spirit keep saying otherwise " I know you tried your best"...not like I didn't blame Him also.
Tho words of man wasn't doing justice, God was doing His thing and gradually I "Picked" myself up, consistently reminding me that the Spirit in me is not One to be timid or discouraged, but one of power, love and self discipline (2 Timothy 1:7).
I got to realise that no one's pressuring me, than me...
...My parents got the ache initially, but they got over it, but I was still beating myself up...
Why? I didn't realize till recently..
Cos I was thinking too much on what others would think or feel..
... driving too much energy away from thanksgiving & gratitude...
... channeling it to reading minds.
It's funny how it took actually going for my graduation to live by my very words..
"If the outcome is as a result of giving it your all, then mehn you did a good job; Close your minds to what others might say, or what the result says, You did well... Appreciate yourself."
Now... going back to my recurring regrets...if I didn't put in all those efforts, feeling bad can be justified..
...but, there are no regrets, for my HARD WORK, the HARD WORK of my family, friends & one-season helpers, and the GRACE of God all need to be acknowledged....4 Years of hard study is a big deal...flaunt it...
So I say a Big CONGRATULATIONS to me and a very PROUD one to everyone of my friends that graduated, either with a 1st Class, 2nd Class Upper (2.1), or like me a Second Class Lower (2.2), 3rd Class, even the ones that had the door opened through for them (Pass). You worked hard for it, be Proud!!! And work harder where you at, and harder where you are going.❤️❤️❤️
© All Rights Reserved
