I went to see my friend this afternoon and I have never felt so uncomfortable in my life.
I could feel it the moment I walked through the door, the air was so thick with tension you could cut it with a knife, distant! so distant. what happened I wonder? you went from not being able to keep your hands off me to absolutely nothing in one day.
Did you sober up or something and realize in the space of a few hours that I wasn't what you wanted.
I wish you would have told me instead of giving me the cold shoulder, maybe then it wouldn't be so heartbreaking.
I want to lay on my bed and hug my pillow and cry, but the rationale side of me is screaming in my ear like a drill sergeant not to do that because I knew it would happen,
that nothing good is ever going to be mine.
So I'm going to take a deep breath, put my big girl panties on, swallow my feelings "again" and move on.
© Mary Bowie