"Dang I swear he/she's such a narcissist". Is this something you find repeating in your head like a broken record every single day? Chances are, if you answered yes, then you're with 99% certainty dealing with a narcissist.

When your relationship evolved did you feel like you had found the love you have been searching for. He/she was just what you had always dreamt of, loving, caring, romantic, all about you. Everything with this person just feels right, their soft touch, warm embrace, the feel of their lips pressed softly against yours. The mask they hide behind is so good it has you completely fooled, until it slowly starts to fall off and the narcissistic traits start shining through.
What is a narcissist, is this person I have fallen deeply in love with really just an evil, vindictive liar under a mask??

Well let's see, do they fit this description??

A person with narcissistic personality disorder is controlling, lies, and is very manipulative. They feel they are superior to the world and have this constant need to be admired by everyone.

Nothing a narcissist is true, they will fabricate stories with such exaggeration and tell lies that they forget they told. Are you just madly in love with someone who you think is a narcissist? Well I'm sorry to be the bearer of bad news but someone who is a true narcissist doesn't love, they don't know how, so move on, stop wasting your time.

Do you constantly argue with your partner? And every time it's your fault, and it's you who needs the professional help because it's you who's crazy? A narcissist will twist things around trying to make you out to be the bad one, why pulling the "poor me" card. They will turn their back on you and smear your name to as many people as possible. You get to a point where it's like walking on eggshells and broken glass, you don't want to say the wrong thing or they'll snap, every step you take, every breath you make, they'll be watching you, waiting for the chance to cut you and make you bleed.

If you stay long enough, you will start doubting yourself, wondering if you really are the crazy one. You will slowly start to isolate, god forbid you be allowed to have any friends, especially guy ones. You'll be accused of sleeping with them all, but really its the narcissist who's the cheater. They will give hints as to what they are doing that they shouldn't be, just to get your mind going. My ex would give subtle hints of cheating but would deny it, always. He'd accuse me of cheating but it was him. He would sit and call me a pill popping meth junkie and say "all you do is pop pills all day and shoot up", well in all truth, I didn't pop any kind of pills nor did I shoot meth, but he did and was. It was his subtle way to say what he was doing.

There will be times when you will look forward to him leaving, you don't have to explain why you made what you did for dinner, you don't have to justify why you are wearing sweatpants with no makeup, your parenting skills won't be undermined. There won't be any one to argue with, you'll be able to relax for a minute, recharge for the next round when he does decide to return.

The abuse of a narcissist comes in all forms, emotional, verbal and physical. The verbal and emotional are the heaviest and are the most damaging. Imagine every day being put down, and called names. I have an attitude, that isn't always filled with loving gratitude and mouth with no filter, that's why he gave me the nickname "mouthpiece".

I ran in the drug world for many years, and wasn't a person who fought physically, I fought with my words, and I was dam good at it. I wasn't going to get pushed over by being a spineless bitch, I was a bitch who stood up for herself. Sometimes the words that came out of my mouth surprised me. But I deserve the same respect as you feel you deserve and if that made me a bitch in your eyes, oh well.

"Ghosting" is something you'll experience often with a narcissist. They suddenly disappear from the relationship with no warning or communication, sometimes just for hours, other times for days or weeks. It gives them this dysfunctional sense of power. They also love to give you the "silent treatment", ignoring you for no reason other then, once again to feel power and control. You are left wondering what it is you have done wrong to get this "silent treatment". Please know you have done nothing wrong.

Breaking up with a narcissist will leave you feeling broken and mentally defeated. You will feel like you are left alone, in a dark place, with a piece of you missing, that missing piece is him/her and he/she's the only one who you feel can comfort your pain. But that is not going to happen, or will it?

A narcissist will return again and again and again. Each time things get worse and worse, you feel more hurt and alone, the mental exhaustion is beyond words. Why do they keep returning? To ensure you never move on from the pain they caused you, and that's the only reason.

You will ask yourself the million dollar question a million times, why did this happen to me, what did I do to deserve this? Please know, you didn't do anything to deserve this, it's not your fault. You pushed away family and friends, because of the jealousy the narcissist has towards anyone you try to spend time with. It is just not worth the argument so you slowly begin to push everyone away and isolate. Worst thing you could be doing, you already feel so alone. Never in your life did you think you'd lose yourself and your dignity for love, love you are giving to someone who doesn't deserve it.
Give yourself time to process things when you end your relationship with a narcissist. It's going to take longer to heal then a normal breakup because the psychological damage can be so severe its going to take alot of healing and work on your part. The trauma that happened to you isn't your fault, but the healing afterwards is your responsibility, no-one is going to do it for you.

Don't give in when your phone rings and the caller id shows "NARCISSIST-RUN-FOR-YOUR-LIFE"..
YOU DESERVE BETTER AND YOU WILL GET BETTER I PROMISE!!!