I had spent years learning all I could about the world, people, and things beyond. Walking amongst angels, demons, spirits, and humans always searching for something that bound us together. Always in a desperate hope to drive away the insatiable curiosity and the crushing loneliness. It started small and hopeful but as I learned and fed the ever growing flame it became an inferno. The more I understood and the larger the flame became the more it burned me. Soon things which had brought me peace, joy, and hope only brought this feeling of sinking depression and all consuming wrath. I felt my perception warp and malform like some aberration had become in control of my own mind. My mind fragmented with parts I deemed unneeded being cast aside like rotted corpses into a mass grave. Compassion became resentment, as I witnessed the same people I would try to help make the same choice time and time again. Trust became fleeting as loyalty always seemed temporary and I found myself expecting the knives that were so enthusiastically delivered into my back. Love became indifference as every person began to bleed into one another each one becoming a faceless hypocrite and potential threat. Even the rage left eventually the inferno replaced by a cold focused hatred of the world. I have never been the same since nor do I believe I ever will be. Though in my own way I believe to have found peace. Peace in the futility of the struggle, in the inevitability of conflict, and in the unending division of people. It is cold but comforting isolation.
© With clipped wings