I thought he’d disappeared and I screamed because I could keep on making new friends and a new family but it would never end with happiness. I might as well just give myself up and get killed if it means not having to see anyone else I love vanish or hate me and almost get killed because of me.

I began to lose hope in myself until Ryder was right beside me confused as to why I was screaming and crying. Once I told him about how I thought someone else I care about was going to die he gave me a hug filled with sympathy. My worst fear is that one day one of these hugs will be the...