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His Light
He had always been there. Cracking jokes at Christmas and lighting up the room at family get-togethers… How had I not noticed before? As child, I admittedly had formed a sizeable crush on him but so had many other girls my age… He was always there. A major constant in my life regardless of whether or not we had actually communicated much when I was little. Now I take an immense comfort in his words… I live my life in paranoia but all of that seems almost non-existent when he’s around… I often try to repress my growing need for escape. Everything closes in on me and when I can’t breathe he’s the only thing that makes any sense.
I am extremely grateful for him and what he’s brought to my life, and I can settle for this…. I’d be lying though if I said I didn’t want more of him. As much as I could get. There’s something beautiful in all of this and the only thing that I find myself envisioning anymore is finding a way to get out of here. To leave with him. I want to show him things… I want to show him feelings. I yearn to make a spectacle out of the purest emotions. Wrap them up in a box and gift them to him. Many things that I lack the words to describe
Even if it’s simple… How do I describe these overwhelming gusts? Every moment of every day I wish he was here … Sitting in the bathtub and resting my face on the porcelain. Lounging on the back porch at sunset while the lightening bugs perform in their final cabarets. There are countless things I want him to be here for and one day I hope he will be. I’d like to listen to Christmas music in dead winter and bake. The house a great comfort and solace. Warm. I wanted him to be there this summer when I had lake water in my hair and we explored cove after cove in Norris. Everything smelled like sunshine and there were stars beating in my blood. I hope that he is with me when I lie in bed late at night and stare at the engravings on my ceiling. There’s a desire in my chest for fall afternoons in the sun. Running through fields and raking up leaves. Hiking through the woods and jumping over creeks. I would show him that really cool tree with the split trunk and pillows of moss. That would be my life. Ultimate road trips to God knows where. Staying in potentially questionable motel rooms because when you ache for adventure its always worth a risk.
I want to live, and I want to breath in aspiration with him by my side. As an equal. God, I love him.
Not everything has to be exciting though. I love it when he cutely grunts out of frustration because the air turns off at night… Or how he turns into some helpless kid when he’s sick. I like it when he belts out songs while he’s driving. He always lets his children sleep in bed with him and even when he knows its wrong he’ll be the first to sacrifice himself for the well-being of another. So much ground has been covered… Here’s to millions of more miles.
By Sugarplum
© The Moonlight Bard
I am extremely grateful for him and what he’s brought to my life, and I can settle for this…. I’d be lying though if I said I didn’t want more of him. As much as I could get. There’s something beautiful in all of this and the only thing that I find myself envisioning anymore is finding a way to get out of here. To leave with him. I want to show him things… I want to show him feelings. I yearn to make a spectacle out of the purest emotions. Wrap them up in a box and gift them to him. Many things that I lack the words to describe
Even if it’s simple… How do I describe these overwhelming gusts? Every moment of every day I wish he was here … Sitting in the bathtub and resting my face on the porcelain. Lounging on the back porch at sunset while the lightening bugs perform in their final cabarets. There are countless things I want him to be here for and one day I hope he will be. I’d like to listen to Christmas music in dead winter and bake. The house a great comfort and solace. Warm. I wanted him to be there this summer when I had lake water in my hair and we explored cove after cove in Norris. Everything smelled like sunshine and there were stars beating in my blood. I hope that he is with me when I lie in bed late at night and stare at the engravings on my ceiling. There’s a desire in my chest for fall afternoons in the sun. Running through fields and raking up leaves. Hiking through the woods and jumping over creeks. I would show him that really cool tree with the split trunk and pillows of moss. That would be my life. Ultimate road trips to God knows where. Staying in potentially questionable motel rooms because when you ache for adventure its always worth a risk.
I want to live, and I want to breath in aspiration with him by my side. As an equal. God, I love him.
Not everything has to be exciting though. I love it when he cutely grunts out of frustration because the air turns off at night… Or how he turns into some helpless kid when he’s sick. I like it when he belts out songs while he’s driving. He always lets his children sleep in bed with him and even when he knows its wrong he’ll be the first to sacrifice himself for the well-being of another. So much ground has been covered… Here’s to millions of more miles.
By Sugarplum
© The Moonlight Bard
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